Faciem Lapide
by Sensara
Summary: A human officer is transferred to the USS T'Kumbra under Captain Solok, facing the cold shoulder at every turn. How will she survive six months with the Vulcans? Rated T for safety.
1. Day 6: First Encounter

_**Disclaimer: To my disappointment, I do not own Solok, but I do own everyone else. Although this is dealing with a character who was introduced in the DS9 series, I found it easier to make this a TNG era story, perhaps taking place in the 5th or 6th season. So that is why this story is listed under "TNG" and not "DS9". For the TNG fans out there who don't know who Solok is, I recommend you watch DS9: Take Me Out to the Holosuite. It's a fun episode even if you're not a fan of the series. But anyway, enjoy the fic.**_

I had been dreading this day for months: I was to be transferred today at 1200 to the _USS T'Kumbra _as an officer in Starfleet's exchange program. The idea of spending six months with an all-Vulcan crew did not appeal to me, and apparently, it did not sit well with Captain Solok either. The commanding officer of the _T'Kumbra _was firmly against this exchange, which made this day all the worse. I was expecting the cold shoulder from everyone on board; Vulcans weren't exactly known for their welcoming attitudes. I was sure to get cold treatment from the captain.

I ate my last breakfast in the _Delaware's _mess hall, mentally preparing myself for my doom aboard the _T'Kumbra_. My friend and fellow science officer Madison had invited a friend of hers: a Vulcan engineer by the name of Ventak. At first I had privately protested his presence, but then I told myself that I might as well get used to eating, talking and working with Vulcans. Despite my initial reluctance to accept him, Ventak was a pleasant enough person, and helped alleviate some of my fears about this new mission I was to embark on. They may not have any emotions, but they were polite when they wanted to be. I reminded myself that I wasn't going to encounter clones of Solok in every department, that some of the Vulcans would probably accept me, if not tolerate my presence. Ventak gave me a little piece of advice before I left, and I thanked them both and took my leave.

…

The woman who stood before me was not quite what I expected. Instead of the standard Vulcan bob, she sported longer hair that was impeccably pulled back into a bun at the nape of her neck. Her cool brown eyes twinkled slightly as she looked me up and down, and I was relieved to see no superior attitude in her glance. There was simply blasé curiosity in her expression, nothing more. This woman, Commander T'Prel, was nothing like Solok. Or at least, nothing like the Solok I had heard about.

The man was notorious at the Academy, as friends or relatives of cadets relayed horror stories of his strict and nearly brutal attitude toward those under him. My friend Hopkins had received a disciplinary hearing his first day in the science labs (for being two minutes late) while Solok was commander of the _Mataka_, and Hopkins never really forgave him. I wouldn't make the same mistake as he did; I was determined to arrive ten minutes before my shift every day, just to be on the safe side.

"Lieutenant Tia Valentin, reporting for duty, sir," I said, trying to inject some confidence into my voice.

"Welcome aboard the _T'Kumbra, _Lieutenant. I will show you to your quarters." Her voice was crisp and cool, nonchalant and collected. She didn't seem disappointed in me or irked by my presence, and I considered that a good start. I picked up my things and walked off the pad, following her out the door and down the corridors.

"I understand this must be strange for you to be working among an all-Vulcan crew. But you do understand that we will not cut you any slack just because of that fact. We expect your best effort, Lieutenant. Captain B'tona spoke very highly of you, calling you one of the most efficient science officers he has ever had the pleasure of commanding. I hope you live up to your reputation."

"So do I, sir. I'll do my duty to the best of my ability."

A small, nearly undetectable smile twitched her lips upward. "We can ask no more and no less of you, Ms. Valentin. Am I saying it correctly?"

"Yes, sir."

"I do not know many humans, having served on this ship for nearly ten years. Your planet is more...diversified than Vulcan. You come from a country that was called Mexico, on Earth, am I correct?"

"I come from the Oaxaca region of Mexico, yes."

"You say it different than I have heard."

I smiled. "That is the way my great-great-grandparents pronounced it. Either way is fine, sir."

T'Prel nodded as we came to my quarters. "Your station is on deck 6, section 7, biology lab. You will be working the Beta shift, from 1200 to 1800. Good day, Lieutenant."

She set off at a brisk pace away from me, leaving me bemused. I stepped inside my quarters, eager to set my stuff down and unpack. I carefully set my bags on the floor next to the bed and took a few minutes to explore: the bathroom was in the back, and there was a small mirror on the wall near the drawers. The bed was neatly and simply made, with a dull red thin sheet covering it. I put my first bag on my desk and started to unpack.

By nature, I was a tidy person, and I knew that would probably come in handy during my stay here. My uniform pieces were already sorted by shirt and pants in my luggage, so it wasn't that hard to transfer them to a drawer. I refolded a few articles that had gotten jostled out of place during travel, and soon my bags were empty and under my bed, and all three drawers I had been allotted were nice and full.

As I traced the elegant yet modern edge of the dresser, I realized that this room was to be my sanctuary, my safe harbor. Out there, among those perfect strangers, I would have to stifle as many as my emotions as I could. I didn't want to become the typical human stereotype: the woman who cries or loses her temper, the woman who lets emotions get in the way of solving a problem. No...I would prove to them, to Solok that I could be just as efficient and impartial toward science without losing my passion for it. I enjoyed what I did; the fundamental building blocks of life, the tiny microbes and the majestic planets that made up our universe fascinated me. It was why I was in Starfleet, to explore, to learn, to let my knowledge of the wide unknown grow.

And I wasn't about to let someone like Solok destroy what I had.

…

My first week aboard the _T'Kumbra _passed by surprisingly fast. I had settled into a simple routine: in the mornings I ate breakfast in the mess hall, happily answering questions if the Vulcans ever approached me. They asked where I was from, what I liked to do. Some even dared to ask what I found so appealing about emotion. I found myself stumped at the question, as I hadn't thought about it. I promised the first inquisitor, a young ensign from engineering, that I would get back to him with an answer as soon as I had one. I told him of my plight, that I had never contemplated emotions that much before. He promised me that this would not turn into a debate between us, but simply that he wanted to try and understand my point of view. I was touched by the sentiment, and told him so.

"_I have no choice in being emotional, Torik," _I explained the next day. _"Humans who suppress emotions often end up as psychopaths. But there's a difference between suppressing and controlling. I can control my emotions. Suppose I'm back on a ship with humans. I just get off my shift and head to the turbolift and someone who just had a really bad day shoves in front of me to get on the lift first. Now...I could give in to my instinct, which would to be to follow him, then yell and scream and insult him for being such a jerk...or I can let it go, telling myself that he probably had a bad day and him being a jerk is not going to affect my day or my emotions. His bad day is his problem-I don't need to make it mine."_

"_Ah," _he replied, a light sparking in his eyes. _"You choose more positive emotions such as compassion to override the more negative emotions such as anger."_

"_Exactly. Humans shouldn't feel negative emotions all the time. It's just not healthy. But to suppress emotion, to have no outlet for your feelings is also unhealthy. Trust me, Torik, there are times in every human's life when we say to ourselves, 'what I wouldn't give to be a Vulcan right now'. Emotions are painful sometimes, but we've learned to live with them, to control them like civilized people."_

From that day on, Torik and I met every day in the mess hall, discussing logic or hobbies or the work we did. He was quite a welcome relief from the stoic, apathetic biologists I worked with every day. My commanding officer was nice enough, always being polite with me, but no one made me feel more welcome than Torik. He was inquisitive, curious, and I could see a hint of deep-seeded wonder in his eyes as we discussed everything under the sun.

It was the morning of my sixth day when the meeting I had been dreading finally took place_. _Torik and I were discussing human colloquialisms and expression when suddenly he stopped his train of thought and nodded behind me. I twisted around to see Captain Solok standing two feet away. His sleek black hair was impeccably brushed into the standard Vulcan bob, and cool gray eyes twinkled at me beneath dark, slanting brows. Sallow cheeks, a strong, masculine nose and perfectly sculpted, pale lips completed his features. I could already see that he was sizing me up, and I stood quickly, standing straight with my hands behind my back. The top of my head came about to his mouth, making him nearly a head taller than me.

"At ease, Ensign," he said coolly, addressing Torik. My companion sat down.

"Lieutenant Valentin," he continued, looking me up and down. "Welcome aboard the _T'Kumbra._"

"Thank you, sir," I replied, making sure my voice was strong and confident. "I look forward to serving with you."

He strode forward and stretched out his hand toward me. I took it, surprised at how warm it was. I had never touched a Vulcan, so I wasn't aware then that their body temperature was higher than that of humans. His hand felt like a sidewalk that had been exposed to sunlight for hours, but it was smooth, his handshake firm. His nails were neat and tidy, much like the rest of his appearance.

"I hear you graduated second in your class at the Academy. And you served two years as an ensign aboard the _Enterprise _before you were transferred to the _Navajo. _You were promoted, then transferred again to the _Delaware_. Captain Picard, Captain Chambers, and Captain B'tona all spoke highly of your performance. I expect no less than your best on this ship, lieutenant. I'll be monitoring your progress."

He turned swiftly on his heel and strode quickly from the mess hall, leaving me a little stunned. I sat back down in my chair and faced Torik again.

"Is he always like that?"

He frowned. "Yes, why do you ask?"

I shook my head. "Nevermind...the only reason I'm here is because Starfleet pushed Solok to accept this transfer. I know for a fact he was against this all along, but the people upstairs made him live with it. And now I'm here...I don't know if they want to teach me a lesson or teach him a lesson. I really don't know..."

"And what lesson would that be?"

I looked up at him. "An exercise in thinking logically? I don't know, I didn't ask for this transfer."

"Starfleet pushed you too?"

"They pushed Captain B'tona...and if this is to teach Solok a lesson..."

"Solok has never been...fond of humans. He finds your emotionalism and illogic distasteful. It is possible that Starfleet is trying to teach him humility and acceptance."

"Maybe...but why me?"

"Solok said you graduated second in your class. All the captains you have served under have given you high praise, one of them being Captain Picard. From the little I know of you, you are able to keep a cool disposition in times of crisis. You are not easily goaded into hysterics, and you do not let criticism get in the way of achieving your goals. Starfleet would not have put you here if they didn't think you could handle it."

I smiled and nodded. "I guess so..."

He nodded back. "We were discussing the phrase 'head over heels in love'."

I grinned and we continued our conversation.


	2. Day 18: Inquisitive

_**Disclaimer: See Chapter 1.**_

The days passed me by, and soon I was looking at my third week aboard the _T'Kumbra. _I had developed a budding friendship with my fellow biologist, T'Kem., but where she was a shining star in an emotionless and cold night, Torik was a blazing sun. He was young, but he was wise. He clung to logic like the ivy clings to oak, but he understood me and at least tried to see my point of view. He was more open than the majority of the Vulcans I worked with.

My superior officer, Lt. Comm. T'Kana, was affable enough at first, but by the third week of working under her, I noticed she was sending subtle jabs toward me and humans in general. Though my fellow biologists never complained or berated me for any lack I might have in comparison to them, T'Kana would often point out the flaws in my reports when I knew they were perfectly acceptable. I even compared notes with T'Kem and found my writing to be on par with hers. I asked if T'Kana ever pointed out flaws in her work, and T'Kem said no. I realized T'Kana was deliberately trying to goad me into an emotional outburst, but I was determined to beat her at her own game. On my own intiative, but with Torik's approval, I began to meet her subtle insults with cool politeness.

"Lieutenant, these figures should be taken out to the fifth decimal place. And your description of the metabolism rate is unsatisfactory." The cold snubness in her voice merely brushed my skin, as I would allow it to go no further.

"Of course, Commander," I replied politely, slight concern lacing my tone, "I'll do that immediately. Is there anything else?"

She looked like she might say something more, but she changed her mind.

"No, Lieutenant, that will be all. Dismissed."

I nodded. "Have a good evening, Commander. I'll see you tomorrow."

I strode out of the labs with my head held high. I glanced over my "faulty" report and mentally evaluated what needed to be changed as I walked into the turbolift. When the doors closed, it took me a few moments to realize that I was alone with Captain Solok.

"Good evening, sir."

"Good evening, lieutenant," he replied in his deep, cool voice. "What are you reading?"

"My report is unacceptable, sir. I am planning revisions."

"That is...unfortunate." I could almost hear him smiling at me, but I glanced at him and no smile was to be seen on his lips. He cocked his slanted eyebrow at me and tilted his head. "I trust this incident won't happen again."

"Of course not, sir," I answered calmly. We came to his stop, and I saw the tiniest little grin twitch his lips before he got off. Despite my cool bravado in his presence, my heart pounded as the turbolift continued to my deck.

I admitted to myself then that, for reasons I could not describe, Solok scared me. Perhaps it was that cold gray glance of his that was still burning into me although he was gone; perhaps it was because he was living up to every one of my expectations. He hid it beneath a stony mask, but I knew deep down he was laughing at me for every tiny little mistake I was making. I'm sure the news I gave to him just made his day. And Torik was right: he certainly wasn't fond of humans.

There were other reasons why I was frightened of Solok that I couldn't explain, that I didn't understand. And I had a horrible, nagging feeling that I wouldn't like the answers when I finally did find them.

…

I finished revising my report an hour and a half later and I caught T'Kana in the mess hall at dinner.

"Commander, here's my report."

She took it from me and glanced over it.

"Is it satisfactory?" I asked quietly.

She nodded, if somewhat reluctantly. When I didn't go away, she looked up at me in confusion.

"Do you have something more to say, Lieutenant?"

"May I sit down, sir?"

She gestured to the seat across from her, and I took it. I breathed in deeply before speaking, making sure my voice was polite.

"I guess I'm not used to the standard you've set on the _T'Kumbra. _I know my performance and reports were more than satisfactory aboard the _Delaware_, but like I said...you're top notch here. So...perhaps you could lay down some guidelines of what you expect from me, because I don't want this to happen again," I said as diplomatically as I could.

T'Kana seemed unsure what to say for a moment, then she nodded.

"Thank you, Commander," I said sincerely. "I want to live up to the high expectations aboard this ship."

"That requires hard work and dedication," she murmured.

"Both of which I'm willing to put in," I replied with a smile. "Have a nice evening, sir."

I inclined my head slightly and strode toward the replicators, my hands behind my back. I had picked up the habit from Torik, who walked like that when he occasionally escorted me to my shift in the biology lab. On those days, I would arrive fifteen minutes early, and he would arrive in Engineering right on time for his shift. He became my living clock, and I told him how grateful I was to have him as my friend time and time again. He would always let the tiniest of smiles twitch his lips upward when I did. It was small, but it was there. I don't think I could have survived three weeks on the _T'Kumbra _without him around; Torik was my saving grace.

I replicated myself one of the thousand Vulcan options from the menu. It only had about ten other non-Vulcan choices, but none of them really appealed to me. After about fifteen minutes of sitting alone in the corner, I felt my skin prickle; someone was watching me.

I looked up quickly to see Captain Solok standing in front of me, holding a tray.

"May I join you, Lieutenant?"

"Of course, sir." I cursed my pounding heart as he gracefully sank into the chair across from me.

"I've been monitoring your progress just as I said I would and I must say, your performance so far is impressive for a human."

Even though I knew what to expect when talking to him, I still felt a slight twinge of anger at his statement, but I kept it down. "Thank you, sir," I said softly as he took a sip of water.

"However...I do have one question. You turned in your report and asked Lt. Comm. T'Kana to set guidelines for you. Why?"

"Sir, if I am to be...efficient and productive on this ship, I need to know what is expected of me."

"You've served in Starfleet for 9 years, 7 months and 18 days. Surely by now you know what is expected of you."

"Every commander is different. I've served with some who are strict and some who are more laid-back."

"You served aboard the _Enterprise _for nearly 4 years. Have you forgotten how to live up to high expectations?"

"I'm not used to serving under a Vulcan commander, sir. I'm not used to such...extreme precision that Lt. Comm. T'Kana expects out of me," I admitted finally. It was a small part of the truth; I didn't dare be wholly honest with him. I didn't dare complain to his face that T'Kana was from the same school of thought about humans as him.

"But I assure you, sir," I continued, "I will give her...give you exactly what you want from me."

An almost imperceptible smile graced his perfect lips. "And what is that, lieutenant?"

"Precision. Efficiency. Productivity. I will give you all those things."

The tiny smile widened slightly. "I expect no less," he replied calmly.

I thought he might leave after that, but he stayed in his seat and continued to torture me with his presence. He asked me many questions about my family, my hobbies, my habits. I felt like I was interrogated as he fired inquiry after inquiry at me, and he kept me talking for nearly an hour. He listened attentively, his elbows resting casually on the table, his fingers steepled in that oh-so-Vulcan fashion, his icy gray eyes burning into mine. His piercing gray gaze made me so uncomfortable that I could hardly bring myself to look into his eyes half the time, but when I did, I'm sure my discomfort and fear was laid bare to him, and I hated it. Just because he was Vulcan didn't mean he couldn't scout out odd behavior. And I bet that he was laughing at me from behind that stony cold glance of his.

Finally he released me, making his excuses and picking up his things to dispense in the replicator. He strutted out of the mess hall, hands swinging casually at his sides.

As he passed T'Kana, who was deep in conversation with another officer, Solok glanced at her, and she returned it. I saw something pass between them, an understanding or a shared victory. I suspected T'Kana was in on Solok's game of "poke the human", and I bit my lip in irritation.

Trying to control my anger, I looked down at my plate and realized I had barely touched anything, as I was so busy telling Solok my life story. But I wasn't hungry anymore, just very thirsty. I downed my water and gathered my trash, then followed the captain's lead and exited the mess hall.

I was grateful that I got a turbolift to myself so I could fume for a bit in private. Still, I kept it under my hat until the doors of my quarters were closed, then I flopped down on the bed and let a few angry tears slip down my cheeks. I usually wasn't this emotional over something so petty, but three weeks without much of an emotional outlet was taking its toll on my nerves.

After about five minutes of indulging myself, I got a grip. I told myself that Solok would expect me to come in here and rage and scream and cry and be emotional, and at the thought, my tears stopped falling and my expression hardened. I wasn't about to give that worthless jerk the satisfaction of knowing that he had gotten to me. He could throw all the dirt he wanted at me, and I would take it like a man.

But still, I needed some sort of outlet. After mulling it over for a minute, I got the perfect idea. It was too late to work on a program in the holodeck, so I simply prepared myself for bed, ready to start on my outlet as soon as possible.


	3. Day 25: The Heart's Invasion

_**Disclaimer: See Chapter 1.**_

The ball seemed to stay suspended in midair, slowly turning from the momentum of my throw. White bands of rubber accompanied by a lone red stripe covered the ball above me, and it slowly fell back toward me. The palm of my hand connected with the soft yet firm surface of the cantaloupe sized volleyball and it soared away from me over the net. I smiled in satisfaction as it landed with a bang on the other side of the court near the white line.

An hour ago, I had created this program. Light caramel colored wood covered the floor, and bright white lines outlined the small court. A wide, glass roof above my head let in streams of sunlight, casting a warm white glow over everything. Silver metal bleachers lined both sides of the court, and a small door to my left led to a tiny changing room.

Here in this spacious, well-lit room, I could blow off as much steam as I wanted, free from scrutiny or judgment. Here my troubles were pounded away I as slammed the volleyball into the floor time and time again, as I worked myself into an exhausted bliss. Already, I loved this program and was eager to start coming here when I had a bad day. It was easy to imagine Solok's face on the volleyball, easy to send it flying across the room as my powerful fist came in contact with it.

Though volleyball was a dying sport back on Earth, I had played extensively with my family and even joined a small local team. We traveled around the area, finding other people to play, combining our talents and winning almost every match. We rarely lost, and I was proudly one of the most dedicated players in the group. When I was in the heat of the game, I became focused, adrenaline pumping through my blood, my heartbeat pounding in my ears. I loved that feeling. The exciting anticipation made my skin crawl, and then the ball would come over the net and I would spring into action. I was told I had a mean spike and a deadly serve, and the sport helped keep me lean and trim. Because of all the jumping and spiking, my arm muscles had developed over the years, and I could take on fellow male cadets in arm wrestling matches any day of the week.

I saved and ended the program, then hurried to my quarters for a quick shower. Afterwards I headed down to the mess hall to eat with Torik as usual. He cocked his eyebrow at my flushed cheeks, and I grinned wildly at him.

"Good morning, lieutenant."

"Good morning, Torik!" I said cheerfully, taking a seat. I took a sip of juice, my eyes smiling at him over the rim of my glass.

"You are...quite cheerful this morning."

"A good workout will do that to you," I replied. His eyes twinkled.

"I take it you found a way to release your emotions in a healthy manner?"

I grinned. "Have you ever played volleyball?"

…

The next two weeks flew by as I taught Torik the ropes of the game. He quickly outstripped me, using his superior agility and strength to stack the odds against me, but most days he restrained himself and let the matches between us be close. I admired that about him, that he cared enough about my feelings to hold back his best effort, and I thanked him after an intense match.

"I swear, Torik, how could I survive on this ship without you?" I murmured. He tilted his head.

"You are not easily phased, Tia. You would manage."

I turned to him, as he had never called me by my first name before. I grinned at the sign, hoping this meant he would stop treating me quite so formally when we were off-duty. His eyes twinkled.

"You do not mind me addressing you in that manner?"

I laughed. "It's about damn time you called me Tia."

The corners of his mouth twitched upward, and we strode from the holodeck together. I was sweaty and I felt disgusting, but I was as pleased as punch for the first time in a month. Finally, things were looking up.

…

Humming slightly to myself, I stretched my arms above my head, then reached for the panel on the wall. I made to type in the program, but it was already running. I knew Torik was off on an away mission, as we were orbiting Nevani IV and they needed help with their weather control system. I entered the holodeck, apprehensive.

I immediately heard a steady pounding, and saw a tall Vulcan male with his back to me on the other side of the court, throwing the ball up, then spiking it against the wall. Whoever they were, they were good, their hand coming into contact with the ball at exactly the right moment. When I thought about it, that didn't surprise me, as Vulcans outstripped humans 2 to 1 when it came to hand-eye coordination.

The Vulcan turned around and I stopped dead in my tracks.

Solok let the tiniest smile on his lips as he strode toward me, volleyball in hand. He was wearing loose-fitting clothing over his slim frame, and he tilted his head at me when he came to a stop.

"I hope you don't mind me intruding on your program," he said lightly, a smirk barely disguised in his deep, calm voice.

"No, I guess not," I replied, my tone of voice bland and neutral. His eyes twinkled in amusement as he examined me, then his gaze dropped to the ball in his hands.

"I have asked the computer for directions on how to play this game, but it might be more productive to watch someone else who knows the rules."

I realized he wanted to watch me play, and that made me very self-conscience for some reason. I had no reason to be; I had played before small crowds countless times. But I hadn't been alone on the court and the crowds had not consisted of just one Vulcan captain who took a strange, almost perverse pleasure in taunting me. This should be interesting.

I nodded stiffly and he tossed the ball to me. Retreating quickly to the side of the court nearest to the door, I stepped over the white line and quickly judged my distance. Taking a few deep breaths whilst dribbling the ball for good measure, I finally stood straight and prepared myself for a serve.

I glanced over at Solok, who had taken a seat in the front row of the silver bleachers, his hands steepled again. I would have to ask Torik sometime why Vulcans folded their hands like that, but I concentrated on the task at hand.

The ball was airborne, then it soared over the net, touching down on the other side of the court.

"As the computer probably explained to you," I said loudly to Solok, "that is a serve. An overhand serve, to be exact. You can't step over this white line when you're serving the ball."

He stood and walked over to where I was standing. "Show me again."

"Computer," I called, "serving practice."

A bin full of volleyballs appeared beside me, and I grabbed one. Again, it went soaring over the net, landing near my first ball. Solok watched me as I demonstrated underhand serves as well.

"There's a variation of the overhand serve that professionals used when this game was more popular. Here, let me show you," I said, taking another ball and backing away from the line. I gave myself plenty of room, then tossed up the ball so that if it fell, it would land right behind the line. I took a few quick steps forward, then jumped and hit the ball with a hard spike, causing it to collide with the opposite wall.

"Too hard, Tia," I muttered to myself, shaking my head. I turned to him. "The point is to land your serve inside your opponent's court. A serve that goes out of bounds is invalid."

"I see. May I try?"

I let him take my place and he picked up a ball. He served it perfectly as I had seen when I walked in, and I watched it fly over the net and land a little further than my serves.

"Good job," I said softly, turning back to him. "So..." I trailed off, unsure of how we were going to proceed.

He cocked an eyebrow. "I understand you've taught Ensign Torik this game. Perhaps you could teach me as well."

"The computer could give you more detailed instructions-"

"A computer cannot correct my mistakes."

I raised my eyebrows, surprised that he would say that. His cold eyes glinted.

"You seem surprised, lieutenant. Is it so amazing that I would say that in some situations, having a flesh and blood person teach is more productive?"

"I didn't mean to look...you caught me off guard with that statement, sir."

"There is no need for 'captain' or 'sir' in here, Ms. Valentin. We are off-duty."

"Then how should I address you?"

"Solok will do," he replied with an almost imperceptible smirk.

"All right...so you want me to teach you how to play volleyball?"

"I believe I already expressed that wish, Ms. Valentin."

I nodded. "So your serve is...actually, it's really good. Ok, come here."

I led him to the center of my side, pulling the bin with me. I picked up a ball and tossed it up, then quickly folded my arms and bumped it over the net.

"That's a bump," I said when his eyes found mine again. "When I was little and I played this game with my family, my first instinct was to fold my arms like this."

I had him toss me a ball, and I folded my hand together as if in prayer and gently swung my arms upward to make contact with the ball. It went over the net, landing just on the other side.

"But the problem with doing it like that is you have no control over where the ball is going. It'll do in a pinch, but it wasn't until I joined a team that I learned the correct way."

I laid the back of my right hand into the palm of my left and weaved my fingers together, then gently locked my elbows so that my forearms became straight. I nodded to him, prompting him to toss me another ball. I hit this one harder, aiming for center court, and I smiled when it landed where I wanted it to.

"See? My forearms create a flat platform for the ball. With my first bump, the bones in my wrist get in the way and usually send the ball all over the place. There's more control with the second option."

"A computer would not have explained that to me as you did, Ms. Valentin. Your anecdote about the incorrect position was most enlightening."

I stayed silent for a moment, staring at him in utter confusion. I didn't know why he was here, or why he was asking me to do this. One day he's subtly rude, making jabs at my people and today he's almost sending me a compliment, calling me more efficient than a computer when it came to teaching volleyball. He was confusing the hell out of me, and I hated it.

"I'm sure the computer told you that when the ball comes on your side, you can only hit it three times to get it over the net. In a perfect game, the first hit would be a bump, the second would be a set." I stopped my explanation and demonstrated the move. I set the ball to him, and he set it back, and we did that back and forth a few more times before I continued.

"And the third move would be a spike."

I edged closer to the bleachers until I was almost to the white line, and I nodded to him.

"Set it to me," I instructed, pointing to where I wanted it.

He obeyed, and when the ball was tossed up, I took a few steps toward the white line, then cut back in toward the net. I jumped and slammed the ball down onto the other side, then landed and straightened up.

He cocked an eyebrow at me when I turned back to him. "Impressive," he murmured, his eyes glinting in that sickening manner. That look in his eye confused me, and I was beginning to despise it. No...no, I didn't despise it, I despised the fact that it confused me. Perversely, I was starting to like looking into his eyes and seeing that smirk hidden there. I was enjoying finding the emotion hidden beneath his stony mask, starting to enjoy the strange game we played. Did that make him my rival? Had I sunk to his level at last that I enjoyed the battle between us? I wasn't in a position to fight back the way he fought me, but I did defy him in the only way I knew how: by being cool where he expected me to be emotional. The challenge he had laid out before me was...intriguing.

I shook my head of these thoughts and walked him through the steps again, then set the ball to him and let him spike it a few times. This took longer than the other two moves, as the steps toward spiking took a while to get used to. I watched him spike again and again, and I realized how strange this was. I was teaching volleyball to my captain, and the very thought was so strange that it almost disturbed me. I wasn't used to seeing him in this light, loose and quick instead of uptight and formal. He had already told me to dispense with rank in here.

My heart began to pound as I noticed his toned muscles rippling beneath his clothing, the way his strong shoulders rose slightly as he made the jump. I flinched as I heard the ball slam into the floor, bringing me sharply out of my embarrassing reverie. He turned to me, satisfaction etched into his features. I smiled.

"You did well, Solok. You're quite the quick study."

His eyes sparkled as he nodded in acknowledgment. "Thank you, Ms. Valentin. Now that I know the game...perhaps we should take this one step further."

My heart raced at his words and I frowned in confusion. "What exactly do you mean?"

"Meet me in here this time next week. Be ready to play."

I stared at him. "Aye, sir."

The softest chuckle escaped his lips. "I thought we had dispensed with rank in here."

"As you wish, Solok. I'll be here."

"I'll be waiting."

I waited until the holodeck doors had closed before I allowed myself to finally relax. I took a swig of water, and as I thought about his parting words, a shiver ran down my spine. His voice had been...disturbing and yet so...enticing. He was tempting me, taunting me, and the thought made my gut lurch.

No.

No no no no no no no NO!

Did that feeling in my gut mean...? How did this happen?

I realized then and there that I had a crush on him. Me, Tia Valentin, emotional, defiant human was crushing on Captain Solok, jerk extraordinaire. I couldn't believe myself, and although I tried to tell myself that I was just imagining things, I knew it was true. Was I confusing this sick game we played for flirting or was I just that crazy? I decided I was that crazy, and I was determined that he would never find out. I examined the problem and realized to fool him (how I was going to succeed was beyond me), I couldn't suddenly back away. I had to act the same way I always did. It pleased me that I would be able to indulge myself and look into his eyes and see that defiant challenge of his, but he was only going to see the cool, easy logic staring back at him.

I was tempted to talk to Torik about this strange new development, but admitting my feelings to him was out of the question. Solok had ears beyond his own, I was sure, and I couldn't risk him finding out. He would torture me about it (in his special, subtle way) for the next five months. I wouldn't hear the end of this for the rest of my career. No...my lips were sealed.

In the meantime, I would tell myself every day that Solok was a jerk and unworthy of my attention, much less my affection or admiration. But no one in my life made me feel the way he made me feel, so angry and yet so...perversely happy at the same time. I felt a flush of heat as I thought about his cool gray eyes and quirky, tiny smile. His features, I realized, were pleasing to me, but I was determined not to let him get to me, not matter how hot he was.

I left the holodeck in disgust, ready to take a shower and wash away not only my sweat but my growing admiration and attraction toward that despicable Vulcan.


	4. Day 32: Unrelenting

_**Disclaimer: See Chapter 1.**_

"Lieutenant."

I looked up at Torik. "Yes?"

He sighed. "You are preoccupied."

I looked down at my untouched food, then nodded. "While you were away repairing the weather control system, I went to the holodeck."

"And?"

"I taught Captain Solok how to play volleyball." I had to restrain myself from flinching as my feelings were laid out afresh before me. As I said those eight words, my voice sounded strange in my ears, like it belonged to someone else. I glanced back at Torik.

"And?" Both eyebrows were raised, indicating that he was fully engaged in this conversation.

"He'd give you a run for your money. I showed up and he was there, practicing his spike against the wall. I definitely got a surprise."

"He started your program without your permission?"

I nodded. "I told him I didn't mind."

"Do you mind?"

Again, I nodded. "It was...odd. It seems now that everywhere I look, I see him...It was disturbing to see him invade my gym, my game..."

"And yet you taught him."

I laughed nervously. "How could I have refused him? Besides, no matter what he told me, I could tell he knew the basics. He asked the computer for the rules, but said he preferred to watch me play."

Torik's eyebrows were in danger of disappearing into his hair. "Fascinating."

"How so?"

He shifted in his seat. "He came down to Engineering about a week ago and asked me about you."

I frowned. "What did he say?"

"He asked me many questions about your personality and the type of things we did together. I confess, I mentioned playing volleyball against you, and I remember that seemed to intrigue him. I didn't think much of it at the time, but I suspect he is researching you."

"Researching me?"

Torik nodded.

"I don't like the sound of that."

"Captain Solok has published several papers concerning Vulcans and humans and their comparative profiles. It has almost become a...hobby of his."

I shook my head in disbelief. "So that's why he told me to meet him next week..."

"He asked you to meet him?"

"Yes. It sounded like he wants to play a game of volleyball against me."

"Did you accept?"

"Yes."

Torik frowned slightly. "I'm not sure if that was wise."

"Why not?" I could hear panic start to tinge my voice.

"There's no need to get emotional, Tia," he assured me quietly. "It's just...I feel Solok intends to use this game as further study, and I don't think that bodes well for you. If I am correct in assuming he's writing a paper, which I could be wrong...than this game will most likely be featured in his writings."

"Do you think I should change my mind?"

He shook his head. "No, go ahead and play him. If you back out now, he could take that as a sign of cowardice, and you are trying to project the opposite. But as you humans put it...good luck."

"I'll need every bit and more. He's like you...he's fast, strong, and he's got a good serve arm. I need to practice."

"Would you like for me to help you?"

I grinned. "I'd like that, Torik, thank you."

He deliberately changed the subject (for which I was grateful) and we continued eating breakfast until it was time to go on shift. Torik had been escorting me more often these days, and it pleased me. He was a wonderful friend, understanding, kind. He was my sounding board, and I felt I could tell him anything. Perhaps I should tell him about how I felt about Solok...I decided only to start mustering the courage to talk about it, and if I did finally manage that, the conversation in question would take place behind locked doors.

…

The familiar tunnel vision crept over my eyes as I watched the ball fly toward me. I charged it, managing a quick bump to give myself a little time. I got under it and set it, then went in for the kill. But Torik was able to get under my attack and bump it back over to me. I jumped and spiked it again, and to my surprise, Torik let it go.

I nodded, backed up to center court, then collapsed on the floor, letting my body heat float upward away from me. It wasn't until I heard faint clapping that I sat back up again.

My eyes automatically widened at the sight of Solok applauding us in the front row of the bleachers. He had apparently walked in while I was caught up in practice against Torik, and I wasn't sure how to take it. He walked out on the court and held his hand out to me, and I took it reluctantly.

"You play quite an intense game, Ms. Valentin," he said as he hauled me to my feet. "I only hope I can keep up with you tomorrow."

He nodded to me and Torik, who had joined us on my side of the court, then left the holodeck with his hands held stiffly at his sides.

"When did he come in?" I asked, cursing the slight fear in my voice.

"About fifteen minutes ago. I will give you credit where it is due, Tia...you are not easily distracted from this game, and you can use that to your advantage tomorrow. If he wasn't concerned about your skills, he would not have bothered to conduct reconnaissance."

"Are you saying that him coming down here was a good thing?"

"Most likely a good sign, yes."

I breathed a slight sigh of relief. "You mean he's worried."

"Not unlikely, Tia."

I laughed. "He'd better be. I'm bringing my best game back here tomorrow."

That tiny smile graced his lips. "That is saying something."

…

"You are certain about this, Tia?"

I glanced at him incredulously. We were walking down the corridors together toward the holodeck, and I was hurriedly braiding my ponytail as we walked.

"You were the one who said I should go ahead and play him," I said, refusing to let my nervousness creep into my voice.

"I am only concerned for your...well-being, Tia."

I stopped and he cocked an eyebrow at me in curiosity. I quickly glanced up and down the corridor and, discovering that it was deserted, wrapped my arms around him before he could protest. I made the contact brief, and when I pulled away, both his brows were creeping toward his hairline.

"Your emotional response to what I said...confuses me."

I laughed. "You're the best friend I could ever ask for, you know that, right?"

The tiny smile returned. "And you are a very good friend to me, Tia. I am pleased that you think so highly of me."

We rounded the corner and stood together in front of the holodeck doors. The program was already running and I didn't want to keep Solok waiting.

"Good luck, Tia. I know you'll play admirably."

I giggled. "I'll try not to disappoint you, Torik."

To my surprise and delight, he reached out and lightly touched my arm before walking away, his hands clasped behind his back. I smiled after him, feeling ten times more confident than I did this morning, and I turned and walked in to meet my doom.

Solok turned at my entrance and nodded to me. A quick scan of the gym confirmed we were alone, to my relief. I didn't want to play against him with other people watching.

"For a moment, I was worried that you weren't coming," he murmured as he walked up to me. I stared him straight in the eye and smiled triumphantly.

"As you can see, Solok, I came."

"Are you ready to play?"

"Let me stretch first, then we'll play."

"Very well."

He sat on the bleachers and I plopped myself down on the floor. I could feel his cool gray eyes following me as I stretched, and it made me immensely uncomfortable. I almost felt naked as I flexed my limbs under his watchful gaze, and I quickly finished my warmup with a few practice sets and spikes against the wall.

Finally, I returned to him and handed the ball over.

"Your serve first."

His gray eyes glinted in that despicably handsome way. "As you wish."

Why did he have to sound so sexy as he said that? His voice simply oozed attractiveness, with his deep, smooth tones and the tiniest hint of a gravely base. The sound that poured from his lips sent shivers down my spine; it was like his voice was caressing my sense of hearing. Damn disarming Vulcan.

I positioned myself in the middle of my side of the court, bent over slightly as I propped my hands up on my knees, ready to move with his attack. Solok stared at me, both eyebrows raised, an unspoken question in his eyes. I nodded to him.

His serve came faster than I could blink, soaring over my head and hitting the court right inside the white line. I stared back at him incredulously and wanted to slap that smug little look off his face, but instead I grinned knowingly and rolled the ball under the net.

"Someone's been practicing," I commented lightly as I prepared myself for his next play.

"Obviously," he murmured back, cocking an eyebrow at me. His second serve was short, and I was able to get under it, bump it upward, set it, then spike it down near the white line on the left side of the court. But Solok was ready for me and parried the attack.

I only managed to score against him three times before we took a break and switched sides. The first one to ten points would win (I revised the rules a little as most days Torik and I were pressed for time), and when we switched sides, the score was 3 to 5, his favor. I knew from his first play that he would show me no mercy, and I gave him none in return. I managed one time to fool him, mustering up for a big attack, then tapping the ball over the net. He wasn't prepared for that and I scored my second point.

It was my serve, and I used the professional overhand against him, landing the ball in the very back of his court. He bumped, set and spiked it perfectly, and I could tell he had practiced the moves extensively. I was mesmerized for a moment as I watched him jump and spike the ball down in front of the net, awed by the amount of toned muscle he was hiding under his shirt. Then my focus returned and I lunged sideways, bumping the ball up with one fist, but I collapsed onto my side. I barely felt the stab of pain in my ribs as I quickly moved to my knees and set the ball. I scrambled to my feet and spiked it back to him, but it went out of bounds and he won another point. 3 to 6, his favor. He was outstripping me 2 to 1, but I was not finished with this fight.

I ignored the ache in my side as he arched his eyebrow at me.

"I'm fine, Solok, don't get your hopes up. Your serve."

His lips twitched upward slightly, then the ball came flying toward me at an impressive speed, and the game continued.

Forty-five minutes later, I was holding him at 7 points to my 5, and it was his serve again. We were both relentless, but I was beginning to regret spending so much energy in the second half of the game. He was slowly wearing me down, but I refused to back down. I could be as stubborn as a mule when I wanted to. _El burro _my mother sometimes called me, but I needed the bull's strength and the ox's stamina in this fight. Solok pounded serve after spike to me, and I deflected them all. I could no longer stand up straight while waiting on his serve or counterstrike, it was simply too much.

_You have got to be kidding me, _I thought to myself as he effortlessly sent another serve flying over the net. Faltering not only from fatigue but also from frustration, I tripped and nearly went sprawling onto the floor. It cost me precious seconds and I literally had to sprawl on the floor to get under the ball. I hit the floor hard, wincing as I bruised my ribs again and winded myself, but I managed to get the ball airborne again. Then I rolled onto my back and set it up, then finally knelt on one knee and bumped it over. I staggered to my feet and waited on his attack, but to my shame and irritation, my knees nearly gave out beneath me. I gasped for breath and supported my weight on my hands.

Two warm hands gently gripped my wrists and pulled my torso upward, and I looked up at Solok. I couldn't read anything in his eyes, not triumph or irritation or amusement. His gaze was neutral, and he shook his head at me.

"You have played admirably, Ms. Valentin, but at this point, your chances of winning this match are less than 15%. It would be logical to forfeit."

"I'll take that 15%," I wheezed, ripping my hands from his grip to clutch my stomach. I squeezed my eyes shut against the tears that threatened to leak out, and his hands carefully gripped my shoulders to prevent me from collapsing.

"Tia." His voice was softer than I expected. It was almost soothing, and if I tried, I could hear the concern in it. I opened my eyes.

His gaze had softened into one of mild concern. "You cannot hope to win against me in the condition you are in. Report to sickbay."

My expression hardened. "Aye, sir."

I gathered my things, and he followed suit, then walked with me out of the holodeck after ending the program. I headed toward sickbay and was surprised to see him walking beside me.

"May I ask where you're going, sir?"

That tiny smile returned. "I am escorting you to sickbay, lieutenant, lest you wear your wounds like battle scars to your shift."

"Thankfully I have tomorrow off," I murmured to myself, but he heard and turned to me, but said nothing.

"I do expect you to be fully healed by the time you do go back on shift. Nursing your injuries would hardly be efficient, would it?"

"No, sir. I want them gone as much as you, I assure you," I replied as we got into the turbolift. I clutched my stomach and squeezed my eyes shut again, suddenly feeling very nauseous. The turbolift ride wasn't helping matters, and I fought the slight vertigo by steadying myself against the wall.

"It appears your injuries are more extensive than I initially thought," he commented, the familiar contempt creeping back into his voice. "I wonder how you managed to last as long as you did."

"Mm, my stubbornness is a blessing and a curse, sir," I said as the lift doors opened and we walked out. I held my head high and breathed in deeply, then winced as my chest protested.

"Do I need to carry you, lieutenant?"

"No, sir," I replied, almost laughing as I picked up my pace to match his. Thankfully, I was soon sitting comfortably on a biobed with Solok observing in amusement as the nurse healed my injuries. I didn't quite understand why he was still here, but I guess he wanted to see the damage he had caused me to endure as I played against him. We finally strode out of sickbay together, my bruised ribs healed, but my confidence a little deflated.

"Such a fierce game as yours comes with a price, lieutenant," Solok murmured as he noticed me wince. My injuries were healed, but I was still sore from the evening's exertion.

"A painful price. You played well, sir. You made everything look so easy, and I never knew Vulcans had that much stamina."

"It's a gift we've put to good use...how are you enjoying learning about our people, lieutenant?"

I smiled. "It's fascinating, sir. And I will definitely take this precision and efficiency I've adopted back to the _Delaware. _My commanding officer won't know what hit her, with five decimal places and a highly descriptive report on metabolism rates..." The last line was mumbled, but he raised his eyebrows at me.

"If you do that, then I will be pleased. Your time on this ship will have counted for something."

I frowned. "Excuse me, sir?" I said as we got on the turbolift again.

That tiny smile made my hands curl into loose fists. "You know well enough that I was against you coming on this ship, lieutenant. But I realize now that having a perspective so radically different from our own is quite refreshing. I find myself enjoying the time I spend with you...and if you'll indulge me, I am eager to eat dinner with you in the mess hall."

I clenched my jaw to stop it from falling open in shock. "Aye, sir," I said, trying not to squeak.

His smile almost widened. "Meet me there in half an hour."

The turbolift doors opened on his deck and he stepped off, and I breathed out a breath I didn't know I was holding in. I didn't know if he was determined to torture me with his presence or if he truly did enjoy my company. Neither explanation made me feel any better about the situation, but I would grin and bear it. It appeared I was meant to suffer on this damned ship with its damned captain who took a perverse pleasure in taunting me with that irritating attitude and seductive smile.


	5. Day 47: Of Stars and Brick Walls

_**Disclaimer: See Chapter 1.**_

I perused the racks of cloth, noticing several lengths that caught my eye, but I was only looking. It had been nearly three weeks since my volleyball game against the captain, and the _T'Kumbra _was on shore leave on Betac II. The region we were in was warm and slightly humid, receiving frequent rains during the spring and fall. It was spring in the capital city where we visited, and several trees were blooming in the area, their flowers a brilliant shade of red. The flowers almost looked like trumpets to me, and the little welcoming committee that met us when we beamed down had insisted on stringing such flowers into my hair. All the females got such treatment, and I didn't complain. Torik was in my party, and he mentioned that they looked good with my skin tone. I laughed at that, thanking him with a smile and a clap on the shoulder.

"Does the pretty lady wish to make a purchase?" the Betacian merchant said in his snobbish voice. I shook my head.

"Is this merchandise satisfactory?" his voice oozed at me.

"It's lovely, but unfortunately, I'm pressed for time. I'm meeting a friend of mine soon, and he should be here any minute."

"Ah, I understand," the merchant said with a knowing smile. I ignored his implications and scanned the crowd for Torik, but he was nowhere in sight. Not surprising considering he had expressed interest in the local museum. But I spied Solok at a stall on the other side of the marketplace, and I moved toward him.

"Have a nice evening," the merchant called after me. I turned back to him and smiled before hurrying off to join Solok.

He turned and saw me smiling at him warmly, causing him to raise both eyebrows.

"Good evening, sir," I murmured cheerfully.

"Good evening, lieutenant," he replied, his eyebrow twitching upward. I grinned.

"Please, sir, just act like we're the best of friends for a few moments if you will," I whispered as I got closer. He chuckled slightly.

"Is the cloth merchant making you uncomfortable?"

Despite myself, I giggled slightly. "He talks too much."

"Have you completed your business here?"

I nodded. "I was only looking for an excuse to get away, sir."

"Then walk with me, if you will."

My eyebrows shot up briefly before I followed him out of the crowded marketplace and through the neighboring streets before we came to a deserted alleyway. His pace slowed and we walked in silent through the quiet streets and byways. It had rained sometime before we had arrived, and the pavement was wet and the city smelled clean and fresh from the shower. I loved the smell of rain, such a rare and precious gift that made everything grow and become green, and the scent was heavy over this part of town. I also smelled salt on the air, and I turned to Solok, who was walking silently beside me with his hands clasped behind his back.

"Are we near the water?"

"Most likely, yes. Lieutenant...there is something I have been meaning to discuss with you."

"Sir?"

"I'm moving you to the Alpha shift, Ms. Valentin. I have a PADD in my ready room with all the information you will require for this change."

My eyes widened. "Aye, sir. May I ask why I'm being moved? Have I done something wrong?"

"No, I have simply come to realize that you enjoy challenges, Ms. Valentin. So...here is a new challenge for you."

I wasn't sure what to say, but his news was pushed to the back of my mind when we came to the end of the alleyway. A boardwalk-like platform was before us, and beyond that was about fifty meters of light blue sand. Lapping at the azure, sparkling beach was a vast stretch of ocean, and it glinted in the dying light. The water was the deepest green color, and it looked strange to me, but it was beautiful nonetheless. A blazing red sun was starting to dip below the horizon, tinging the sky in the most astounding fiery hues imaginable. I gasped.

"Oh my g-" I broke off my sentence and quickly covered my mouth in complete awe of the scene before me. I shook my head in disbelief as I slowly walked forward to the railing. I put down my hands and leaned against the wooden rails, and Solok strode up beside me, his hands still clasped firmly behind him.

"It is quite an impressive sight, isn't it, lieutenant?" he remarked lightly. I laughed.

"This is amazing..." I breathed, staring out over the water. A cool, salty breeze ruffled Solok's hair, and I smiled as he brushed it back into place. He caught my expression and almost looked exasperated, so I looked away and suppressed a grin.

"For humans...such a scene as this would be conducive toward the urge to mate...am I correct, Ms. Valentin?"

I stared at him in shock. "Um...for some people, yes." As I thought about it, I could see that it would be consistent with his behavior to throw me for a loop after I saw him even slightly untidy.

"Fascinating...and how do you feel about such a scene, lieutenant?"

I glanced at him. "You mean what do I feel like doing when I see a beautiful sunset or the like?"

"I believe I said that."

I sighed and stared back out over the water. "I don't feel like making out, if that's what you're asking." I nearly blushed at the thought and privately cursed him for making me talk about such a delicate subject. "When I see something like this, my first thought would be to take a holoimage, or to paint the scene, or write a poem."

"I see," he murmured, placing his olive-toned hands on the railing next to mine. "You are not the romantic type then, lieutenant?"

Despite myself, I laughed. "No, not generally. I can be if I want to, I guess..." I trailed off and we stayed silent until the stars began to appear in the darkening sky. I looked up at the vast array and sighed in awe.

"Never fails to get to me...I wonder where Vulcan is," I wondered aloud.

Solok pointed to a spot just above the horizon, toward the fading sunset. "In the pair of stars 30 degrees above the horizon, the one on the left," he replied calmly. I laughed.

"Bless your logic, captain...you know on Earth, Vulcan is part of a trio of stars that form a straight line. They're the belt in the Orion constellation. It's one of the most recognizable constellations in the sky, the first one I could name, at least."

"Interesting...from my childhood home on Vulcan, Earth's sun was a faint star that rose just above a mountain on the horizon..."

I turned slightly to him, no laughter on my lips. Although it was probably nothing, I was touched that he would share that detail of his life with me.

"Some day, I'd like to visit Vulcan. I've never had the pleasure of going."

The tiny smile returned to his lips. "Most humans find the gravity and the heat quite uncomfortable."

I smiled. "I was born in Mexico, I know hot. The gravity...I could manage."

"The atmosphere is thinner than that of Earth."

My smile widened. "You said yourself I like a challenge. I would learn to adjust."

"Are you planning a permanent vacation?"

I looked at him and raised my eyebrows. "No, sir, I just feel that if I ever did visit your planet, I would want to stay for more than a few days. I like to explore, and that takes time."

He shook his head at me. "You are quite a fascinating human, Ms. Valentin. It would please me if you got the chance to visit my home."

I smiled to myself and we stared out over the dark water for a few more minutes before he insisted we return to the beam-up point.

"Torik mentioned this shore leave was really superfluous. According to him, Vulcans don't require this kind of rest, and frankly, that doesn't surprise me."

Solok nodded. "For Vulcans, to rest is to rest, to cease using energy. But Starfleet insists we take a shore leave every ten years. It was a compromise we were willing to make."

"Every ten years?" I muttered incredulously. "You are a strong people..."

We walked on in silence, and the warm evening descended into a chilly night. I wrapped my arms around myself and nearly shivered, and Solok raised his eyebrows at me.

"Are you cold, lieutenant?"

I narrowed my eyes at him knowingly and dropped my hands. "I'm fine, sir."

Onward through the streets we roamed, and I trusted Solok's memory to get us back to the marketplace and the beam-up sight. But as we walked down a pitch black alley, I instinctively drew closer to my companion as I felt the back of my neck prickle. I swore I heard faint footsteps behind us, and my heart began to race.

I remembered my grandfather telling me once that whispers carried further than a low voice. "Captain," I murmured to Solok.

"I hear them, lieutenant," he muttered back. "But as they are unlikely to give us any reason to be concerned, I suggest you relax."

I nodded stiffly, but I couldn't help my hammering heart. The familiar adrenaline rush began to creep into my veins, and despite Solok's words, I felt my body stiffen, ready for fight or flight.

A dark shadow stepped out in front of us, I stopped immediately. I could see another shadow to my left and to Solok's right, and I turned around and saw two more behind us. We were surrounded.

But Solok was undaunted by the men, and he walked right up to the one in front of us.

"Excuse me," he murmured, trying to move past him, but he was shoved back toward me.

"You're not going anywhere, pointy eared freak," the man slurred. "And neither is the girl."

"May I ask why you are detaining us here?"

"You've stepped into our territory, so to speak," the man replied, and I could hear the laughter in his voice. "We don't like that."

"If it displeases you so much that we have stepped into your territory, as you put it," Solok responded coolly and calmly, "then it would be logical to let us leave, and we will not bother again."

"Your high and mighty Federation bother with the likes of us?" the man said, feigning shock. "What a thought!"

The men laughed and I could feel them draw closer, and I moved closer to Solok in response.

"We think we might just have ourselves a little fun, pointy eared freak. But I'm a reasonable man. Give us the girl, and you can walk free."

"I am not leaving her in your hands," Solok replied. "I would advise you not to take any violent action against us."

"Or what, the rest of your crew will come to your rescue? Are they all pointy eared freaks like you? I thought I saw those freaks in the marketplace this morning, but I don't see any others here."

"Solok to transporter room, two to beam up."

The men laughed again. "We thought you might try that trick. We've got a communications dampening field on this entire area. We're not the idiots you think we are."

"I made no comment on your intelligence, sir, and I do not believe you have telepathic abilities, therefore your last statement strikes me as illogical."

"Illogical? Who the hell cares about logic?"

I shook my head in disbelief at these thugs. I was glad they didn't know who they were dealing with, and I was sure they didn't know the severe disadvantage they had to my Vulcan captain.

"I must call you unintelligent if you do not place value in logic," Solok replied, still cool and calm.

"I didn't ask for your opinion, freak," the man spat. I scowled at him, and he grinned back.

"I wonder how the pretty girl feels about spending time with this freak, boys." The men laughed. "How would you like a little time with us?"

"I'd rather spend eternity with him than five minutes with the likes of you. Unlike you and your friends, I actually enjoy intelligent and civilized conversation."

The man laughed. "She thinks we're uncivilized! How unladylike of you, miss. Why don't you come on over here and I'll show you how civil I can be."

"How ungentlemanly of you to not let us be on our way," I countered.

"My offer still stands, miss," he said, walking up to me. His face was still in shadow, but I saw the silhouette of untidy, mangy hair. "You stay with us, and your friend walks free. Save him now, or you'll regret it."

He reached for me, and when I stepped back away from him, Solok quickly got behind him and took him out with the Vulcan nerve pinch. The other men leaped forward, and one got my fist to his face and reeled away from me. Another aimed a punch at Solok, but the captain held the attacker's fist in his hand until the man collapsed.

Suddenly, I felt myself restrained, and I was shoved face-first into a dirty brick wall. I felt my nose crunch against the hard, rough surface and could only hope my nose wasn't broken; the pain exploded into my head, and I cried out. The man restraining me held both my hands behind my back, and his other hand slipped down the front of my pants. I screamed for him to back off and I struggled, but he had too firm of a grip on me.

"He wasn't lying when he said you'd regret it," the man breathed in my ear, his horrid, hot breath wafting over my skin. He withdrew his hand and pressed me firmly against the wall, his groin digging into my backside. I yelled again and stomped my foot hard down on his instep, but he was wearing sturdy boots that did not relent to my attack. He laughed at me.

"Nice try," he hissed, pushing me even harder against the wall. I struggled and cursed him with every insult in the book, but he only ripped out my hairband and roughly unzipped my shirt. I was grateful that I had a camisole on, but if Solok did or could not come to my aid soon, the gray undershirt would be gone.

I felt a breath of cool air on my back, and I continued to struggle. I wasn't going to make anything easy for this perverted bastard. A warm, disgusting tongue touched my neck, then I felt the unbearable pressure against me ease.

I spun around and saw Captain Solok gripping the man's shoulder with a slightly triumphant gleam in his eye. He guided my assailant to the ground, then stepped toward me.

"Are you injured, lieutenant?" I shook my head.

"My nose hurts, but..." I shrugged my uniform jacket back onto my bare shoulders.

The triumphant gleam died. "I understand," he murmured. He walked forward and carefully took the zipper of my uniform in both hands, the released it.

"Broken," he muttered. He picked up the remains of my undershirt and examined it.

"Ms. Valentin, if you will allow me, I can salvage enough of this material to make you look at least a little more presentable," he said softly. I nodded.

I took off my jacket and he tied the camisole around my chest. I repressed a shiver when his warm hand brushed my hair over my shoulder, and I felt comfortable pressure hold in the tears that threatened to spill down my cheeks.

"Thank you, sir," I breathed, shrugging the jacket back over my shoulders. Solok nodded and turned to examine one of the downed assailants. I knelt down a little ways from the man I had punched, and his eyes snapped open.

I gasped as I felt a sting of pain in my abdomen, and my strangled, rattling cry alerted Solok. I fell backwards against another one of the men and looked down at my stomach. Bright crimson blood was staining my camisole and uniform. A warm, strong chest supported my back and an olive-colored hand reached around and staunched the bleeding, being careful not to touch the knife. As rivets of my blood squeezed between his fingers, I put my hand over Solok's and fought the darkness that appeared at the edges of my vision.

"If you die from this, I will be most displeased," I heard him murmur to me. I smiled.

"You said yourself," I gasped, squeezing his hand tighter, "I like a challenge."

The last thing that crossed my mind before I blacked out was that underneath the sharp metallic smell of my blood, the smell of his skin was really...really good...

…

My eyes slowly opened and I saw above me the familiar blue and white décor of sickbay. I blinked and my eyes became more focused, and I turned my head to the left.

Torik was sitting with his eyes closed, his hands folded in that Vulcan steeple style, and I smiled.

"Why do Vulcans fold their hands like that?" I murmured to him. His eyes snapped open and he cocked an eyebrow at something behind me.

"It is a way of focusing one's energy."

I jerked my head to the right and saw Captain Solok sitting in a chair, his hands identical to Torik's.

"Perhaps Ensign Torik can explain. If you'll excuse me, lieutenant, ensign, I must return to the bridge."

Before he could leave I called softly to him. "Captain." My voice was no more than a whisper, but his Vulcan ears heard me. He turned and set his gray gaze upon me, and a tear rolled down my cheek.

"Thank you," I breathed, wishing the tear had never fallen.

"When you're recovered, I will deliver that PADD to you."

I remembered that I was to be transferred to the Alpha shift. "Aye, sir. I look forward to reading it."

He nodded and departed, and with him gone, I let the rest of the tears that I was holding in fall. I knew Torik would understand, but I didn't want to appear even weaker to Solok. My confidence was already beyond shattered, and I was more scared and embarrassed than I had ever been; I was eager to heal and recover what I had lost to those five men. And Solok, it seemed, was eager for the same, and that thought comforted me and heightened my embarrassment. He had seen me humiliated, beaten, pinned against a brick wall in some now far-off alleyway, helpless and in need of help. It pained me to recall that night, and more tears streamed down my face.

"Torik..." I murmured, turning back to him and holding out my hand. I needed something to hold onto, someone to comfort me right now. He took my hand, and I relished its warmth.

"I am...relieved to see you safe, Tia."

"What happened? After the attack, I mean."

Torik raised his eyebrows. "Solok carried you to the beam-up point and had you transported directly to sickbay. The doctor performed emergency surgery, and you've been in here ever since. Solok came in ten minutes ago to check on you, and since you showed signs of regaining conscientiousness soon, he decided to stay until you awoke."

"How long was I out?"

"Thirteen hours, seventeen minutes."

I laughed softly, then winced. My abdomen protested such movement, and I carefully dislodged my hand from his grip and laid it over my wound.

"Doctor Ventak told me to advise you not to try and sit up just yet. He would like to perform a full examination before he allows you to move."

"Great...well, I got all my reports done before going down to shore leave...maybe I should write a memoir of my experiences among Vulcans," I said with a smile. "That'd be a real page-turner."

"I doubt you'll be in here quite that long, Tia," he said, his eyes glinting. "Ventak is a skilled doctor; he'll have you healed in a very timely manner."

"Of course."

He almost smiled at me. "Your attempt to stay optimistic in such a situation is...admirable. And I would like to inform you that should you need someone to talk to..."

"I know where to go," I said, taking his hand again and squeezing it.

"Although I am not familiar with the emotions you may describe to me, I will try my best to understand."

"You're marvelous, you know that?" I told him. His warm, brown eyes gleamed. "Where would I be without you?"

He cocked his eyebrow in slight amusement, but squeezed my hand back.


	6. Day 53: Calm

_**Disclaimer: See Chapter 1.**_

"So...first week on the Alpha shift..."

Torik raised his eyebrows. "How did it go?"

"All right...the chief science officer stopped by and asked me a few questions, otherwise...it was like any other day, but with different people."

I looked down at my plate and scooted the untouched salad around and around with my fork, not really noticing what I was doing.

"Why are you doing that?"

I glanced up at him.

"Doing what, Torik?" My voice was harsher than I meant it to be. "Sorry, what?" I said apologetically.

His brow furrowed. "Tia...are you sure you're all right?"

"I'm fine...thanks for asking, though. No one else on this ship..." I trailed off, not wanting to express my growing frustrations in public, even though they were gnawing at me like a dog chews a bone. I shook my head and picked up my tray, preparing to leave him, but when I stood up, the tray dropped back to the table with a clang, and I steadied myself against my chair. I stared out the window as chills covered my arms, and I groaned and shook my head when I saw static cloud my vision as I looked out at the stars.

Torik was at my side a moment later, one hand supporting my elbow, the other lingering near my shoulder.

"Tia?"

"Head rush," I said, smiling in an attempt to reassure him. "I think I need to lie down."

He nodded and understood that I didn't want to be escorted out, and I quickly gathered my trash and dispensed with it in the replicator. I hurried out of the mess hall, and it was only when the doors to my quarters closed behind me that I let the emotions that were building all day out. I flopped down on the bed, and I felt like screaming when no tears came. All day, I had been antsy and uncomfortable, frustrated and irritated for no reason. I didn't know why I felt this way, but I wanted it to stop. I closed my eyes and tried to go to sleep.

After an hour of lying in the dim lighting, I finally told the computer to turn off the lights and to gradually turn them up at 0600. There was now no light in the room but the soft glow from the replicator, and I closed my eyes even tighter to shut it out. I felt my body start to relax and I slipped into the arms of sleep...

_My brain was apparently only waiting for me to go to sleep before it transported me back to the place I didn't want to be. Darkness surrounded me as I wandered through the alleyway, and I was acutely aware that Solok was not beside me this time. I knew in my bones that they were waiting for me, waiting for an opportunity to strike, to pin me up against the wall again._

_I heard laughter and it sent shivers down my spine; I cried out for anyone to help me, but I only heard more laughter. I began to run back toward the water, and I leaped easily over the railing and onto the sand. But the sand slowed me down, and I could barely move my feet. I tripped, but nothing that I tried made me get up again. I could feel them getting closer and I had to get away! The waves came rushing in, lapping at my arm that was bent awkwardly above my head, now rushing in and filling my mouth, clogging my nose..._

I awoke, gasping for breath and forcing myself up away from my pillow. I felt a few tears finally fall down my face, but only two or three squeezed out before my eyes were once again dry. I rolled over onto my back and sighed as cooler air found my face, and I quietly asked the computer for the time.

"0200," it chirped back.

I groaned and rolled onto my side away from the replicator, trying to will my body back to sleep, but it did not obey me. It wasn't until 0500 that I felt my eyes begin to droop, but now it was too late, so I rejected sleep and replicated some coffee for myself. I had programmed it in back during my first week; Vulcans did not feel the affects of caffeine, therefore they had no need for coffee and its ilk.

I groggily pulled uniform parts out of the drawer to replace the one I had slept in, and I shoved the dirty one into the laundry. I headed for the shower and let the freezing water coax me toward a more awakened state, and it did help a little. I didn't feel quite as inexplicably hormonal today, but my mouth was as dry as the deserts of my home, and the minute I wrapped a towel around my shivering, goosebump covered body, I replicated water to try and quench my thirst.

As I realized it was going to be another day of guzzling water and avoiding food and driving myself into an exhausted state with volleyball in a pitiful attempt to find sleep, I realized something was very wrong with me. I admitted to myself that I had not laughed or felt any sort of positive emotion for a week, that I probably needed help. I considered turning to Torik for help, and although the idea appealed to me, I didn't want to reveal to him just how much I was hurting inside. I needed someone who knew what happened, who could understand the pure terror I had felt on that night. I needed someone who was there with me.

...

I breathed in a deep breath before stepping off the turbolift. T'Prel gave me a meaningful look and nodded to a door on the opposite side of the bridge. I nodded back to her and muttered "Good afternoon, sir", then stepped into the captain's ready room.

The room was small, but impeccably tidy with a sleek, polished desk to one side. On it was a miniature communications console and a pile of metal sticks that I recognized as the Vulcan game of _kal-toh_. Torik had explained the game to me, but I didn't feel brave enough to even attempt to play. At the moment, one side of the sphere had emerged, and it looked about a third of the way toward completion. But I knew that one wrong move could revert the strange half-formed sphere into a jumble of metal sticks.

It wasn't until the door had shut behind me that Solok even acknowledged me, but when he did, the triumphant gleam in his eye was back. His cool gray eyes rested on me for a moment, and they looked me up and down.

"It is...pleasing to see you recovered, lieutenant."

"Thank you, sir. I'm happy to be back on duty."

His eyes glinted. "Why have you come to see me?"

I sighed and closed my eyes. "Sir...I haven't felt this...emotionally compromised in...ever. I feel...so tired and irritated at nothing...I'm not sleeping, I'm not hungry. I'm probably dehydrated to boot."

"If you are experiencing such symptoms, I suggest you report to sickbay."

"Sir, with all due respect, I don't need medicine right now. I need peace, or else some counsel."

"That is understandable, but I fail to see why you are coming to me with this need."

"I know the Vulcans have meditation techniques that you use to let go of emotion. Perhaps someone could teach me a few of them. I could really use some of your Vulcan calm right now..."

He was quiet for a moment. "When did all this begin, lieutenant?"

"After shore leave, sir." I closed my eyes again lest he delve into them and examine my soul. His gaze was too intense for me to bear at the moment.

"I see...you believe this is all stemming from the incident in the alleyway?"

"Yes, sir." I slowly opened my eyes and discovered he had quickly and silently moved from his chair behind the desk to standing three feet in front of me. His hands dangled at his sides and he tilted his head at me. I could almost see the familiar taunting in his gaze.

"To achieve this 'Vulcan calm' as you put it requires a great deal of discipline."

"I'm willing to do whatever it takes to..." I stopped, not wanting to admit how much this was affecting me, that everything I had tried in order to free myself from this emotional baggage wasn't doing me any good.

"Yes, lieutenant?"

"To regain my confidence, sir. I want to prove to you that I can succeed in the challenge you have set for me. And to do that, I don't need to be distracted by...unpleasant thoughts."

"I see," he replied, his hands going behind his back. "And why come to me for help?"

I frowned. "I only ask that you direct me toward someone or something that can help me. Please, sir...I don't care what I have to do...you know volleyball is my emotional outlet, correct?"

"Correct." He tilted his head again, looking intrigued.

"It's not working."

Solok was silent for a while, and his gray eyes never left mine in the five minutes or so that he contemplated my request. His eyes burned into me, not quite as cold as when I first saw them, but they were distant, far away in a place I could never touch...

"Go to holodeck 2 tonight at 1800. There will be someone there who might be able to help you."

I breathed a sigh of relief and thanked him profusely, but he held his hand up. "This requires a great deal of mental discipline, lieutenant, the kind most humans are not used to. However, I have seen you control your emotions on numerous occasions. You will find a similar sort of control is required for the meditation techniques you will learn."

I nodded. "I understand, sir."

He almost smiled. "Dismissed."

I exited the room, but I thought I saw him take a deep breath as I turned around. The look in his eye after he dismissed me was unreadable, but it stayed with me all the way back to my quarters.

…

Torik's eyebrows strayed toward his hairline as I relayed the afternoon's meeting to him.

"You requested to learn Vulcan meditation?" he asked, his voice nearly dripping with incredulity, or perhaps surprise.

"I asked for help, and he told me I'd learn meditation."

Torik nodded. "That confirms my suspicions."

"Suspicions? About what?"

He looked up at me. "At this point, I do not believe Solok is intending to publish any work concerning your time here. I think he is curious about you now for your own sake."

My eyes widened. "You're sure?"

Another eyebrow quirked upward. "Does that bother you?"

I shrugged. "Maybe. It is a bit...disconcerting."

I was tempted to elaborate, or at least have us go to a deserted part of the ship so I could. This curiosity Torik said the captain had for me sounded a little like attraction, and the thought was way too thrilling to me for my own good. The idea held too much weight, too much potential disappointment and heartache for me to dwell on it for too long. Up until now, I could convince myself that this attraction was a young woman's infatuation, a passing obsession that would go away with time. But now, with even an iota of the thought that he was attracted to me...

"Tia."

I glanced up at him, not even aware that I had zoned out.

"I am glad you are seeking help in this matter. It...concerned me to see you so unhappy."

I smiled. "Thank you, Torik." I didn't need to say anything else, and for the first time in a week, I finished everything on my plate and felt pleasantly full.

"You have seven minutes and three seconds to get to holodeck 2."

I nodded and thanked him for everything, then exited the mess hall alone.

…

The desert winds whirled around me, and I shook the blasting sand out of my hair and eyes as I stepped into the entrance of the cave. I looked back, awed at the beautiful blood red sky, at the expanse of stars above the fading sunset, at the sheer gorgeousness of the brutality of this place. I knew this was a simulation of the planet Vulcan, and this only increased my desire to visit the planet in person. I turned away from the incredible scene and walked toward a warm yellow glow that was coming from inside the cave.

After a few twists and turns, I came into a place that was lit only by candlelight and the fading sunset outside; what looked like a smokehole to me cut away at the ceiling, and I could see the stars far above me. Small candles sat in every nook and cranny in this almost circular room, and many more candles were strewn about the sandy cave floor.

In a space surrounded by said candles sat a Vulcan. He was slender and had on light, loose clothing, but his head was bowed and I couldn't see his face. His olive-colored hands were folded in that Vulcan style, and I smiled in anticipation of a more thorough explanation of the gesture than Solok gave me back in sickbay. Focusing my energy sounded like a step in the right direction, and I slowly approached the man.

"Sir?"

He gestured to the space across from him and I sat cross-legged on the sandy floor. After shifting a bit to get more comfortable, I watched the man in silence for about five minutes before I cleared my throat. My throat was actually still rather dry and I didn't mean it as a sign of disrespect, but nonetheless, the Vulcan shook his head.

"You are impatient, Ms. Valentin. Patience is one of the keys to controlling your emotions."

I clenched my jaw to stop it from dropping. Solok raised his head and his lips twitched upward, and he tilted his head at me.

"Are you really that surprised, Ms. Valentin?"

"Yes," I admitted. "Though in a good way."

"Really? How so?"

"This...spares me having to explain why I'm so restless. You were there, you saw."

"In reality, I was so occupied with neutralizing the other attackers that I only saw the aftermath. But in essence, your statement is correct. The sight of you so compromised was disconcerting, Ms. Valentin."

I nodded. "Thank you for teaching me, captain."

He shook his head again and I realized my mistake. "Solok...I'm sorry, I didn't mean any disrespect."

"I'm honored that you feel you must give me such respect even when I have refused it in this setting. You are...intriguing, Tia."

I nearly blushed at the use of my first name. "You are my captain, Solok. You deserve my respect."

I swore I nearly saw a smile on his lips at that. "As for your thank-you, I have not taught you anything as of yet."

"Thank you for what you are about to do," I revised, smiling at him. "And thank you for showing me this program."

He nodded. "You allowed me to stay in your volleyball program, so I thought it only fitting that I show you these caves. The originals are on Vulcan, near my home. I often come here to meditate."

"They're beautiful, Solok...I hope I get to see caves like this one day..."

"On Vulcan?"

"Yes," I whispered. "On Vulcan."

Another almost-smile graced his perfect, pale lips. "The first step toward any meditation technique is deep breathing. Breathe in through your nose and out through your mouth."

I obeyed, but he shook his head.

"Do not slouch, Ms. Valentin. Sit with poise."

I sat up straighter, sitting with my shoulders back, but still he sighed.

"You should be relaxed, not stiff. Sit naturally, please."

I relaxed my shoulders, and that seemed to satisfy him.

"Now, fold your hands together like this."

He folded them in the Vulcan fashion and I followed suit, touching my forefingers together and pointing my thumbs upward, pressing them together.

"Close your eyes and breathe deeply."

I obeyed and breathed about ten breaths before I felt his hands on my abdomen and my back.

"No, do not open your eyes," he said, exasperation nearly tinging the edges of his voice. "It astounds me that an athlete such as yourself has not been instructed in proper breathing techniques. Do not let your shoulders rise when you breathe in. Focus on forcing your diaphragm outward. Your shoulders should not move."

I focused as he instructed, and I felt his hand move out with my abdomen as I filled my lungs with air.

"Relax...breathe as if you were sleeping."

The warmth of his hand slowly seeped through my clothes into my skin, and I found the sensation pleasant. Too soon, he moved his hand away from me, and I felt a loss as the warmth that his hand offered slowly faded.

"Keep breathing," he said, his voice a little further away. "I'm going to lead you in an exercise that hopefully will help control your negative emotions, but first...think back to the incident on Betac."

The alleyway appeared clearly in my mind's eye.

"Describe the image in your mind."

"I'm in the alleyway...against the wall...he-"

"That is sufficient. What emotions come to you when you think of this?"

"Fear," I said simply.

"Why do you feel fear?"

I opened one eye, as the question struck me as odd, but he shook his head. I closed my eyes again.

"Um...I'm scared because...well, you know..."

"Because you were nearly assaulted."

"Yes."

"And why does this scare you?"

I opened my eyes and frowned at him. "What are you getting at, Solok?"

He tilted his head. "The man did not succeed in his objective. Why are you still frightened?"

I opened my mouth, but didn't know what to say.

"You are frightened of a mere possibility, a chance that failed. This strikes me as illogical."

Part of me winced in anger at his words, but I was beginning to see his point.

"Such men as your assailant use fear as their weapon. If you let this fear rule you, then they will have won."

I considered his words, then smiled. "Aye, sir...Solok."

He nodded in approval. "Close your eyes, Tia."

I obeyed.

"Examine your fear...move through it, let it fill you."

I frowned, as this seemed to be the opposite of what I was trying to accomplish.

"Only when you understand your emotions can you let go of them."

I nodded and took a look at my fear. Why was this so traumatizing to me? Why wasn't I letting this go? Torik described me as not easily goaded into hysterics, and I realized I was making this a bigger problem than it really was. But why?

I examined deeper and felt shame fill me as I remembered feeling so naked before Solok as he pulled the man off of me. This Vulcan had defeated me at my own game, turned my heart inside-out, and he had seen me at my most vulnerable. I was clinging to my fear because the alternative was facing my shame.

"I'm a coward," I muttered to myself.

"You should not feel shame at being so...exposed to me, Tia. The incident was not your fault, and there was little you could have done to prevent it. Now...imagine your shame and fear is a wave. You are standing on the shore of a vast ocean, and your fear and shame are washing toward you."

I imagined it, visualized the crashing waves, felt the fear and shame afresh. I winced.

"There is a brick wall between you and the oncoming wave. Let the emotions crash onto it, then let them dissipate."

It was not easy to do this part of the exercise, but after about an hour of going over the exercise again and again, I felt my negative emotions fade. Just one night wasn't going to help this, and I told Solok this fact.

"Then we will continue every night until you are free of these emotions."

I smiled and felt tears prick my eyes, and I turned away, closed my eyes and hastily wiped the tears away. A warm thumb brushed them from my cheeks, and I heard a rustling noise before I opened my eyes again.

Solok was standing and offered me his hand, which I took. He effortlessly hauled me to my feet.

"I am impressed that you had the amount of patience with this exercise as you did, Ms. Valentin."

I grinned. "You can thank my grandmother for that. Abuela Ramirez was one of the most patient women I've ever known."

His eyes glinted as he led me from the holodeck. "I will admit that when you first came onto this ship, I never expected you to last this long. I predicted that by this time, you would come begging to me for a transfer back to the _Delaware_. You continue to surprise me, lieutenant."

I didn't admit it, but he was continuing to surprise me. I didn't expect him to be the one to teach me Vulcan meditation, nor did I expect him to be this polite and understanding toward me. The thought that he might be attracted to me came back to mind, and I quickly hid my reddening cheeks from him. But he caught my movement and raised an eyebrow.

"Is there something wrong, lieutenant?"

"No," I said meekly as we stepped onto the turbolift. "Nothing at all, sir."

His eyes glinted and he looked amused. "You surprise me sometimes, Ms. Valentin, but in many ways, you are very much an illogical human."

"What can I say? I can't help myself."

He glanced at me. "Perhaps you are right."

We rode the rest of the way in silence, and soon we were standing outside my door.

"Use the techniques I showed you tonight before you go to sleep, and I believe that may help you."

I nodded. "I'll do that, sir. Thank you."

I looked away, at a loss for words, and I was about to bid him goodnight and escape into my room when I felt a warm hand ever so gently turn my cheek toward him.

"It pleases me that you are willing to delve into our traditions, Tia. Sleep well."

His hand left my face and he turned to leave.

"Good night, sir!" I called softly after him. He turned around and nodded to me, that defiant, triumphant gleam in his eye once more. I grinned and stepped into my quarters.


	7. Day 95: Immersion

_**Disclaimer: See Chapter 1.**_

With Solok's help, I managed to banish my feelings of shame and fear over the Betac incident. But even after we solved my problem, he continued to immerse me in Vulcan culture. He seemed to take great pleasure in teaching the ways of his people to me, and it pleased me to learn. I was finally able to discuss Vulcan art and literature with Torik during mealtimes, and he seemed as pleased as Solok with my new found passion. Anthropology had always been a side interest of mine, and to fully immerse myself in it for a month was a true delight.

One day I walked into the holodeck to find myself in a casual cafe in the Caribbean on Earth. I raised my eyebrows at Solok, who was seated across the room at a table for two. On the spindly table was a game of _kal-toh. _

"You have got to be kidding me..." I murmured with a grin. I doubted even Solok could teach me the ins and outs of this game. It was far too complex for me to handle, and I preferred to watch others play.

"I do not jest, Ms. Valentin. Have you played this game before?"

"I am an absolute failure when it comes to understanding _kal-toh_."

"With such an attitude as that, you will be a failure. However, I feel you have the capability to succeed in this game. Do you understand the concept?"

I shook my head, and he proceeded to lecture me on the game for about an hour. The brilliant Caribbean sun sunk toward the distant horizon, and I smiled at the sound of the waves crashing on the shore. I watched him play, half my mind on the game, the other half immersed in distant memories. I had relatives who lived on the coast of the Yucatan, and I remembered visiting them on my twelfth birthday. Tio Jorge and his wife Libertad lived in a small house on the beach, and we went swimming in the ocean every day for a week. The saltwater had stung my eyes, but I couldn't stay away from the big blue. The feeling of weightlessness and freedom that I felt in the water was a sensation I loved, and at the sight of the ocean on Betac, I hadn't even acknowledged the memories that had surfaced to the forefront of my brain. I hadn't been swimming in ages...

"Ms. Valentin, your mind is not on the game."

I shook my head apologetically, then smiled at him. "Do you mind if we walk down by the shore?"

He almost looked exasperated, but that tiny smile graced his lips and he picked up the game. "Since I am unlikely to regain your attention, very well."

Five minutes later, we were walking on a thin passage of sand as the waves washed around our feet. To Solok's bemusement, I had insisted on taking off my shoes and walking barefoot, telling him there was something special about feeling the wet sand between one's toes. The captain had simply tucked his pants into his boots, telling me that under no circumstances would he get wet. The sandbar we tread upon jutted up out of the water and created a white line through the blue, just big enough for two people to walk abreast.

"Why do you desire to walk in this place, Ms. Valentin?"

"It reminds me of home," I said simply, a touch of wistful nostalgia in my voice. "My uncle lived on a beach like this, and I remember visiting him several times..."

I told him stories of all that I used to do on the beach, from building sand castles to snorkeling. We came to the end of the sandbar and walked along the beach of a tiny island out at sea. We climbed a rocky hill (I put my shoes back on before I attempted that) and soon I was dangling my legs over the rock face, staring out over the water with Solok at my side.

"Why did you choose the Caribbean, sir?"

He raised his eyebrows at me as I turned slightly toward him. "Humans find such a setting as this to be comfortable. I only desired to put you at ease."

I nodded and folded my hands lest I forget myself and throw my arms around him. "Thank you, sir, that was...thoughtful."

"You have spent a month immersed in my culture, three surrounded by my people. I'm sure you find it tiresome at times."

"Maybe a little, but only on a bad day."

He tilted his head at me. "You have three months remaining on this ship. How has your experience been so far?"

I smiled. "What was once hell has become an unexpected sanctuary."

"I see...you were reluctant to come aboard."

"I was terrified, really. In a way, I was being asked to represent the entire human race, and that's a lot of responsibility to represent your people day in and day out. But then I realized I was not an ambassador, that I was here to learn about your people, and for you to learn about me. One of the hallmarks of humanity is the astounding number of mistakes we make."

I thought I saw a smile on his lips. "You felt a more accurate portrayal of humanity would be more efficient?"

"Yes."

His eyes gleamed. "I admire that about you, Ms. Valentin. I think your thought processes are becoming more logical every day."

"Spending time around Vulcans will do that to you. Besides, logic is good for the brain."

He quirked an eyebrow at me. "You believe that?"

"Yes, I do. Thinking critically, logical reasoning and the like are always good for human brains. That's how it gets its exercise, so to speak."

He gave me a look, and I smiled in understanding. "Would you please teach me the game of _kal-toh_?"

"I would be honored."

He set the game between us, and I moved my legs and faced him.

"Please be patient with me, Solok. Even though you've explained it to me, I think it would be more efficient to see someone play who knows the rules."

His eyes glinted as I repeated his own words back at him, and he nodded.

"As you wish."

Again, it struck me how incredibly sexy his voice was, and a large part of me wanted him to keep talking so my hearing could be surrounded by his smooth, dulcet tones. But instead, I concentrated on the game in front of me, trying my best to think logically about the puzzle at hand. We continued to play until a cool wind ruffled our hair, and we realized it was getting dark.

"Changeable atmosphere...nice."

"I wanted it to be as realistic as possible," he replied.

"You did a good job, sir," I said as we stood and ended the program. "How do you like Earth's Caribbean?"

He shook his head. "The view was lovely, but I found such proximity to a large body of water to be foreign, almost unsettling."

I frowned at him, then nodded in comprehension. He came from a barren desert planet, and of course he would be unused to being in or near water that was deeper than his height.

"Do you know how to swim?"

He nodded. "I know the basics. When I was an ensign, I revealed this...lack to my commanding officer and he promptly taught me. It felt...unnatural at first, but I found it quite pleasing after a while."

I nearly laughed at the thought of Solok floundering around in a pool. "There is nothing more pleasing than jumping into a pool on a hot summer day."

"When did you learn to swim?"

"The first memories I had of swimming...well, I remember when I was little, I would hold onto my mom's shoulders and she would swim around with me. I think by the time I was six I was swimming on my own."

We had come to my door, but I didn't feel like breaking off this conversation so soon.

"Would you like to come in?"

He nodded. "I have a feeling you have more amusing anecdotes about your childhood, and I am eager to hear them."

I laughed. "My childhood is chock-full of crazy stories, yes."

I walked in and sat cross-legged on the bed, and he took my chair, placing the _kal-toh _set on the desk.

"Please, continue." His eyes gleamed, and I swore I could see laughter there.

"We spent my fourteenth birthday at the city pool, and I remember the water was really cold that day, so I sat in a lounge chair and read a book. Well, my brothers had different plans, so I didn't notice them coming until they had trapped me. They carried me between them to the water and threw me in, and that water was_ so_ cold," I recalled, giggling at the memory. "I got them back, though. I got some ice water and poured it over their heads at lunch."

"Your illogical human pranks are fascinating."

"Don't tell me you were little Mr. Perfect when you were a kid," I protested with a grin.

His eyes glinted again and he stayed silent for a minute, then he nodded in defeat.

"No, I had my fair share of mistakes when I was young. All Vulcan children learn logic and reasoning first from their parents, then from a mentor. My teacher displeased me, and I felt he worked me too hard. One day, in the middle of a lesson, I stormed out, frustrated and angry, and I ran through the desert to some caves."

The playful smile on my lips had completely faded, and I frowned at the idea of Solok being emotional. It felt wrong, and yet made perfect sense. I realized I was wrong in my assumption that Vulcans were emotion free. I started to see now that they simply suppressed and controlled their feelings, and the realization...made me sad. I hadn't even fathomed what sort of internal battle every one of my colleagues had to go through every day.

"I rushed through the caverns, blinded by my anger, and I lost my way. I started to cry in my fear, until my teacher's lesson came back to me. I controlled myself and thought logically about the situation, then managed to find my way back out using deductive reasoning. I returned to my mentor and apologized for my ignorance, and from that day forth, I embraced logic. The program of the caves where I told you I meditate are a recreation of those caverns from my childhood, where I first learned the value of reason."

I was amazed that he had shared such a personal story with me, but I was touched. I gazed into his eyes and tried to see emotion, but found nothing but unfathomable flickers.

"What happens when a Vulcan doesn't embrace logic?" I asked quietly, almost fearful of the answer.

"Our ancestors were a violent people, cruel and volatile. If we do not control ourselves and our emotions, then we are like them, volatile, violent, and very, very dangerous."

I was silent for a moment before I opened my mouth. "Then you embrace logic for your own safety."

"And for the safety of others, Tia."

I couldn't hold back the brilliant blush that spread over my cheeks. For some reason, the use of my first name after his explanation put us on a more personal level that frightened and exhilarated me. The thought that he was attracted to me didn't seem like such an unlikely idea now. I had definitely made some sort of impression on him, as I knew he wouldn't have dared explain that to me three months ago.

"Captain...I am deeply honored that you trust me with such information."

"I only ask that you not make this public. Few truly understand our nature, but since you have shown such an affinity for every other aspect of our culture, for logic itself, I felt it appropriate that you know this as well."

"Your secret's safe with me, sir."

"I do not doubt that, Ms. Valentin...it is getting late, and I must take my leave of you."

He stood and walked toward me. "In all candor, I never thought I would enjoy spending time with you, Tia. But thankfully, I find myself looking forward to our meetings."

He carefully took my hand in his, and my heart began to pound in anticipation. "It would honor me greatly," he said softly as I gazed fearfully up at him, "if you would consider me your friend. We have already taken steps toward initiating such a friendship, so I find it only logical that we get to know each other on a more personal level."

"I'd be...honored to do that, sir," I breathed, hardly knowing what to say. He shook his head.

"When we are alone and off-duty, wherever that may be, you may call me Solok."

"All right," I whispered, my heart still racing from his touch.

The tiniest expression of satisfaction brightened his eyes, and he squeezed my hand gently before releasing it.

"Good night, Tia. Sleep well."

He turned on his heel and left me alone, and I collapsed back onto my pillow and tried to absorb what had just happened. It was amazing how quickly the relationship between us had changed, how quickly he had gone from my personal demon to my personal hero, mentor and friend.

_Mi amigo. _I turned the phrase over and over again in my head. _My friend, my friend._

How often had I cursed Solok's name, spat on the very thought of him, hated him for making me feel the way I did? And now, how often had I blessed his presence, thanked whatever deities were out there that he had come into my life, felt my heart race at his very touch? Three months had passed me by in minutes, and a man I had feared and despised had asked that I call him friend, and I was starting to like him, really really like him.

I could only wonder where we'd be in another three months.


	8. Day 105: Foolishly Brave

_**Disclaimer: See Chapter 1.**_

I looked up from the PADD I was reading and smiled at Solok, who had just taken the seat across from me.

"I hope I'm not interrupting your reading, lieutenant."

I grinned. "You're fine, sir. Torik isn't here, and I'd like some company."

Solok nodded. "I have come to make a proposal."

For some reason, that made my heart pound a little faster. "That being?"

"Would you like to join me in the holodeck for another volleyball game?"

I grinned. "Only if you're ready to lose," I teased, keeping my voice low. His eyes glinted.

"Actually, I was thinking of playing with you against holographic opponents."

I raised my eyebrows, then slowly nodded. "Ok..."

"If this displeases you, we can of course play against each other."

"No, let's play together."

I met him in the holodeck fifteen minutes later and he ran my program, then began to tweak it, adding another human and a Vulcan for us to face off against.

"This should be interesting," I murmured to myself as I stretched. Solok glanced over at me.

"I am confident that you and I can defeat them, even though they are computer generated opponents," he said as he bent over and touched his toes. I glanced up at him under my lashes and saw the way his spine jutted from his back, and I traced the lovely curve of it with my eyes. When he looked back at me, I looked away under the premise of switching stretches.

When I was done, he offered me his hand, which I took with a triumphant smile.

We played remarkably well together, holding the computer at 3 to 1, our favor. Solok was merciless with his spikes and serves, and I was able to contort my body to get under the ball faster than he could.

"You do not spare yourself in this game, Tia, I will grant you that," he commented after I had made a painful lunge forward to save the ball.

"Neither do you," I replied after he dropped to one knee to bump the ball; even with knee pads, that looked painful.

We finished our game 6 to 2, our favor, and I smiled at him in triumph over the rim of my water bottle. He gracefully sat down beside me on the bench and watched me take another drink, and I raised my eyebrows at him.

"That was fun," I murmured after lowering the bottle.

"Our abilities complement each other," he agreed. "That was quite an...invigorating game."

His choice of words nearly made me blush. "We did well. Though I can't hope to match your strength and speed...not by a longshot."

He shook his head. "That may be...but your determination and perseverance were very admirable."

I turned to him. "Thank you, Solok...that means a lot to me."

I swore he almost chuckled at that. "Although I may not have said it the last time we played this game, you do play quite well, and I have never seen a human officer with your...stubborn determination."

"I told you, its a blessing," I sighed, taking another drink of water. My throat was sore from the exercise, and I was eager to get back to my quarters and drink some hot tea.

"And a curse," he completed with that spark in his eye. I barely saw his eyebrow quirk upward, and I couldn't help but notice how sexy he looked in that moment, his hair slightly disheveled and his eyes glinting at me. After a few moments of staring into his eyes in silence, I finally looked away.

"Your absence will be felt when you leave us, Tia, however..." He trailed off, and I thought I heard uncertainty in his voice. That got my attention and I looked at him in earnest.

"Yes?"

"Although this ship prides itself on its all-Vulcan status...I believe I would be willing to give that up."

"Solok...what are you saying?"

"If at any point you should decide to make this transfer permanent...I would be more than pleased to accept it."

He was offering me a permanent commission aboard the _T'Kumbra_, a chance to continue our relationship. He was offering me a way out of the dilemma of getting over him. Could I live with Vulcans for another six months, another year, another five years? I was an introvert by nature, so I didn't need too much social interaction, and this program was perfectly suitable for blowing off any excess steam. Maybe it wouldn't be so bad to stay...

"I'll give your proposal serious thought, captain."

He nodded in satisfaction and gestured to the door, and we walked out together.

…

My small team of five trampled through the forest, scanning as we went, with only the sound of the crunching twigs and beeps of the tricorders to accompany us. We were doing a biological survey of an M-class planet, nameless as of yet, near the Romulan neutral zone. It had been discovered five years ago by a Vulcan science ship, and now the _T'Kumbra _was here to continue the work. We were considering this planet as possible use for a base or a colony, so we would be spending a week and a half exploring the planet and documenting our findings.

"There's a river 500 meters to the east of us, sir," a male ensign commented. "I'm reading large amounts of diaketricite in the water."

We all examined the data on our tricorders and agreed to explore this phenomenon further. We still had an hour left before we had to report back to the ship, and this was unusual and intriguing.

I walked behind the leader of the team and beside the male ensign. The ensign's name was Mavik, and he was tall and lanky like Torik, with slightly darker olive skin than most of the other crew members. He was on the Alpha shift and was always polite to me, and we were on the fast track toward becoming friends.

Twigs snapped beneath my feet, and the sound was satisfyingly sharp. Leaves and brush rustled as we walked on through the forest, and we came out of the trees onto a wide ledge over a lazy, glistening river.

I could hear the river's muffled roar below us, the constant trickling of gallons and gallons of water. Birds sang in the trees around us, their song masked by the voice of the river, and a chilly wind ruffled our hair. It was the middle of spring here, and I spied a field of wildflowers on the other side of the bank and downstream from our position.

We began scanning and discussing the data, eyes focused on our tricorders. Ensign Mavik stayed beside me, but I heard a rustle in his direction and turned my head. We had fanned out a little, and Mavik had strayed closer to the edge of the cliff. I was just about to warn him not to go any further when he stepped on a loose stone and flayed forwards. Time seemed to move slowly as I took a step forward, but it was too late: Mavik stumbled over the ledge and plummeted twenty five meters down into the freezing river.

The remaining four of us rushed to the edge, careful not to follow Mavik down, and the team leader tapped her comm badge.

"T'Lau to _T'Kumbra_, we have a man down. Can you beam Ensign Mavik aboard?"

"_Negative, there's a large amount of interference in your area._"

I sighed and began to strip, and the others looked at me like I was ludicrous.

"Someone's got to go in after him," I said simply as I took off my pants and boots. "Do any of you know how to swim?"

They all shook their heads, and in my undershirt and boy-cut shorts that I wore under my pants, I backed up a little from the edge, then ran barefoot over the cliff, plunging feet-first into the river.

I landed with a splash, my arms tight at my sides in pencil style, and I came up for air with a gasp. It felt like someone had punched me in my chest, and any warmth in my body was quickly fading. I had to find Mavik, and I saw ripples downstream where he had fallen in, and I swam toward them, then plunged underwater.

The water was dark and cloudy all around me, but I saw a floundering dark shape ahead and swam toward it. The freezing flow of a passing current caressed the back of my neck like the cold fingers of death, and I shivered. Bubbles streamed out of my mouth as I came upon an underwater grove of thick, spiky weeds, and I saw that Mavik was entangled in them. The thorns of the plant were digging into his legs, causing rivets of green blood to cloud the water, and he was desperately trying to free himself, desperate for air. I swam to him and put my hand on his arm, and he turned toward me, bubbles escaping from his mouth. I motioned for him to be still, then began to free him from the thorns. My clumsy fingers stung as they touched the plant, but I ignored the pain and focused on freeing him. He needed oxygen quickly, and his dark gaze was becoming listless. I stopped what I was doing and shook him, trying to encourage him to stay with me, to hold on for a few moments longer. Finally, the last of the thorny weeds was cast from his legs back toward the swaying clump, and I dragged him upward.

But instead of going up, we began to sink. Mavik was unconscious, and his boots and jacket were becoming a dead weight. I was beginning to feel light-headed, and my lungs were fit to burst. I could only hold my breath for two minutes at most, and that time was slipping away from me fast.

I felt the freezing cold touch of death across my neck again as I tore off the young Vulcan's boots and unzipped his jacket. I let them float away and tried to drag him upward, but he was still too much of a deadweight. I could hear my heartbeat pounding in my ears as my brain begged me for oxygen, but I couldn't fulfill its desire. Mavik dragged me down, and I looked up desperately at the surface of the water. If only I were stronger, I could get us both out of the river. Cold, cloudy water surrounded my bones, and I felt myself relaxing my grip on Mavik. Darkness clouded the edges of my vision and I suddenly felt so tired...

Suddenly, a strong pair of arms wrapped around my body and pulled me upward. I felt cold air on my face as I broke through the surface with a gasp, and I was dimly aware that someone was dragging me toward the riverbank. I felt myself lifted up, and I closed my eyes in relief, breathing in great gasps of air to fill my tired lungs. Hard ground pressed into my back, and warm hands retracted themselves from my body. I barely heard the crashing sound of someone's approach, and I opened my eyes enough to see black boots running my way. How strange...

My body was moved into a sitting position, and the wet, clinging cloth of my undershirt was ripped from me up over my head, and I felt the shorts go down my legs. There was more splashing to my left and more gasping breath, and I felt something beside me. I opened my bleary eyes and saw green leaves far above me, and beyond that a clear, blue sky. I felt a chill wind whisper over my freezing skin, and I shivered in the cold. A jacket was wrapped around my shoulders, and I clutched it to my chest, grateful for the token amount of warmth it offered me.

A strong, warm chest pressed against my back, and the chest heaved as it took in air; I felt wetness seep through my jacket.

"Are you injured, lieutenant?" The voice was familiar to me, but my brain couldn't place it right now. It was masculine and deep, crisp and clean like the wind blowing in my face. I knew that voice...

I stared listlessly at my fingertips, which were still bleeding. I barely registered the cuts that ran all down my hands and arms, but I winced as an olive hand reached around me and touched my fingers. I hissed in pain and instinctively held my hand to my chest, and I heard the soft chirp of a comm badge.

"Solok to transporter room, can you get a lock on us?"

"_Negative, captain, there's too much interference. Proceed two hundred meters south and the interference clears enough for transport._"

"Acknowledged," the voice replied. _Solok..._My brain hardly registered the name.

I was lifted and cradled in someone's arms, and their warmth seeped into my skin and helped drive away the chill.

"In my personal opinion, that was...foolish of you, lieutenant. Yet your actions were valiant, and I will note that in my log. You are to be commended for your bravery and quick thinking."

I barely comprehended what he said to me, simply nestled my soaking wet head against his warm, inviting chest and tried to sleep. His nails dug into me.

"I understand that you must be tired, but please try and stay awake until we reach the ship."

Stay awake...but it was so hard...

The river was still whispering a sweet, deadly song to me, and the breeze moved softly through the trees, and the rustle of the trek was somehow...quite soothing. And his chest was so warm...

"Mm," I moaned softly, leaning further into him. His nails dug deeper and I whimpered.

"Tia," he nearly growled in my ear, "stay awake, we're almost there."

His pace increased, and soon I heard the chirp again.

"Four to beam directly to sickbay," Solok commanded, and I felt the tingle of the transporter beam...

...

I awoke and stared into a pair of gray eyes, and I smiled softly at them.

"Hello, captain..." I murmured.

"You have an uncanny knack for finding trouble, Ms. Valentin," he teased softly. I knew deep down it was a tease, no matter what he might say in protest. I chuckled.

"What happened?"

"You dived in after Ensign Mavik fell into the river," answered another voice. I turned and looked at Torik and smiled widely.

"You're back!" I rasped at him. His eyes twinkled.

"Yes, I am back. As I was saying, you dived in, and as a result nearly drowned. When the captain pulled you from the river, you developed an early onset of hypothermia."

I moaned. "How's Mavik?"

"He will make a full recovery, and once he does, I'm sure he'll want to thank you," answered Solok.

I nodded and felt myself drifting back to sleep. The last thought on my mind was the sensation of a warm hand touching mine ever so briefly...

…

I was released from sickbay the next morning, and I went to work as usual. Mavik was there as well, and he thanked me graciously for trying to save his life. I noticed that all throughout the day, if I needed a piece of equipment, Mavik handed it to me before I could even turn and look for it. I was touched by the gesture and told him so, and he nodded politely.

I lay in bed that night, deep in thought. Mavik was grateful for my quick action, yes, but we both knew we owed our lives to Solok. I recalled his strong arms wrapping around my body, holding me close. I felt a flush of heat and shook my head, burying my face in my pillow. That was the second time I had been damsel in distress, that he had carried me to safety. But at least this time, I wasn't quite so helpless. I bet Mavik felt more ashamed then me, being clumsy enough to fall into the river. I should have said something earlier...

My thoughts drifted to his earlier proposal, and suddenly it hit me how meaningful that proposal was. When I came aboard this ship, Solok was not only against my coming, but he was determined to drive me away with subtle insults. He tried to make my life hell, relishing in his Vulcan pride, certain that Vulcans were ultimately superior to humans.

And now...he said he would be willing to give the ship's all-Vulcan status up. For me, no less. _For me._

Another flush of heat consumed my body as I thought about it. The notion that he might be attracted to me came back, and I was willing to entertain that thought for the first time. Why was he so eager to teach me about Vulcan traditions? Was he priming me for a life on Vulcan? A life with him?

My heart stopped at that, and I immediately told myself that it was ludicrous to think that. He was simply indulging himself in that Vulcan pride in a way that benefited both of us. Who doesn't love to show off their culture to other races? Perhaps that was it. Yes, he was only showing off Vulcan culture to the human officer aboard his ship...

I shut off my thoughts and drifted into an exhausted sleep.


	9. Day 135: The Garden Waltz

_**Disclaimer: See Chapter 1.**_

A cacophony of sound and color assaulted my senses as I stepped into the ballroom: diplomats from every corner of the Federation, high-ranking dignitaries, Starfleet officers and various honored guests filled the room. There was a loud murmur of over 800 voices muttering to each other on top of clinking glasses and chinaware, soft Hemak music, and the soft, almost imperceptible tinkling of a fountain. The place was beautiful, with spiraling, black obsidian pillars holding up an ornate ceiling of silver and turquoise. Red curtains and colorful tapestries hung on the wall, and I felt I was in a medieval castle back on Earth. It was astounding how much detail had been put into this room. On the other side of the floor was a large, two-story high set of glass double doors that were flung open onto an outdoor garden. The whimsical yet elegant pillars created a recessed arcade that bordered the open ballroom floor, and in this arcade were hundreds of small, eight-person tables draped in the most luxurious black velvet. Every table was lit by several candles, and each of the creamy white balls of wax was carved into intricate designs, some geometric, some more organic. The arcade also created a second-level balcony that ran all around the room, and yet more tables were set up there. From the midnight-blue ceiling hung the most fabulous chandeliers: they seemed to grow down out of the ceiling like living rock and crystal. Every piece was thinly carved out of marble or obsidian, and the most striking contrast of black and white threw an interestingly patterned yet soft light over the entire room. On the inside of the pillars, sconces hung; the same contrasting obsidian and marble pattern had been reproduced in the small sources of light.

The Hemak were joining the Federation, and they had taken out their best to prepare for this joyous occasion.

The _T'Kumbra _was one of fourteen starships in orbit around Hemak Prime, and I had heard that the _Enterprise _and the _Delaware _were also here. I slowly moved my way through the crowd, searching for a familiar face. All my Vulcan crewmates were also spreading out, seeking refuge from the extraneous chatter at the small tables or out in the gardens. We had shuttled five Vulcan ambassadors here from Starbase 115, and they strode in with all the graceful grandeur and dignity that their race could afford. I felt so lucky to be here; it wasn't every day someone got to see a new race enter the Federation. Despite all the tedious speeches and boring procedures, the parties and receptions were always fun.

I was approached by a Hemak waiter, and I took a second to examine his appearance. His skin was a mottled blood red color, and bright white spots dotted his head. At the nape of his neck, long, curly black hair tumbled down his back in an elegant ponytail. He bowed to me and offered me the tray he was holding, and I took a drink from it with a murmured thank-you.

"Lieutenant Valentin."

I turned at the sound of my name and smiled widely at the man in front of me. A native of Alpha Centuri, my former commanding officer was slightly heavyset, with the thinnest gray mustache underneath his nose.

"Captain B'tona!" I exclaimed, offering him my hand. He shook it heartily, his light blue eyes twinkling at me.

"It's good to see you again," he said in his booming voice. "We've missed you over on the _Delaware_, you know. The biology labs took it hard...probably because they had to pick up the slack you left behind," he said with a laugh. I smiled.

"I've missed them too, sir."

"So..." he continued after taking a sip of his drink. "How are things over on the _T'Kumbra_?"

"I...never thought I would be so sorry to leave a ship. I really will miss it."

B'tona raised his eyebrows. "I wasn't expecting such a positive answer from you, lieutenant. You know I have nothing against the Vulcans, but...I thought you'd be miserable aboard the _T'Kumbra_!"

"I was...for a little bit. But I got over it."

"Tell me," he said with a grin. "How did the crew take having such an emotional presence in their midst?"

I laughed. "Some of them didn't exactly like me, but I really didn't care. Most of them were just curious about me, I guess. Captain Solok has a fine crew."

"He and I met at the formal reception this afternoon. He spoke very highly of you, lieutenant, not that I'm surprised."

My eyes widened. "Thank you, sir," I murmured sincerely.

"I'd have to call Solok a fool if he didn't think you were a fine officer. He's lucky to have you aboard his ship."

"I'm the lucky one, sir...Captain Solok has been...absolutely fantastic over these last few months. I don't know where I'd be without him."

B'tona frowned and leaned closer. "Are we talking about the same Vulcan, lieutenant?"

I laughed. "Tall, thin, gray eyes? Yes, captain, you heard me correctly," I said with a grin.

He raised his eyebrows. "You'll have to tell me more about him when you get back to the _Delaware_...that is, if you come back."

I frowned. "Sir?"

"Solok mentioned that he had offered you a permanent commission with him, which surprised the hell out of me. Do you know what you're going to do when the six months are up?"

I shook my head. "I still haven't decided. Five months ago, I would have immediately refused. But now...the thought actually appeals to me."

B'tona tilted his head. "Starfleet Command must have seen something in you that I never saw. I honestly thought you'd be begging me to sneak you back to the _Delaware._"

I laughed. "You're not the only one who thought that, sir. But in all candor, I'm tougher than I look. And the Vulcans aren't that bad once you get used to them. The stoicism can get tiresome after a while, but they were always very polite to me. They're a good people..."

B'tona nodded. "Well, whatever you decide, its been a pleasure serving with you, lieutenant. I wish you the best in your future."

I nodded back and took his hand with a smile, and I couldn't help but wonder if I would ever shake his hand again. The captain strode off toward some Bolian diplomats, and I took a sip of my drink.

"I'm pleased to hear you say that, Ms. Valentin."

His voice oozed into my ears, and I closed my eyes briefly before turning around and meeting his piercing gaze.

"Say what, sir?"

Solok tilted his head. "I heard you compliment my people, Ms. Valentin. You defended my crew against B'tona's skepticism, and I am honored that you would speak so highly of us."

I shook my head. "You, your crew and your people deserve every compliment I gave and so much more."

I swore he almost smiled at me. "Would you care to join me, lieutenant? I believe they will serve dinner shortly."

I followed him up a twisting spiral staircase to the second level, and we chose a table in the corner. The tables around us were also deserted, as most people were still downstairs mingling. I hadn't noticed the smaller, more intimate tables up here on the second level, as they were hidden in the shadows. Our table was as such, shrouded in darkness and small enough that if I reached across the table, I could easily touch Solok's chest. The collection of candles on our table was a pleasing array of small, slightly flattened globes and a centerpiece candle that looked like a dragon to me. The figure was snakelike and spiky, but wings that reminded me more of fish fins sprouted from its back. The wick was set up so that the flame would appear to come from the creature's mouth, and I was reminded even more of dragons. I had half a mind to steal the thing and take it back to my quarters, it was so beautiful, so skillfully carved.

"I wish I could carve something like that," I murmured, resting my cheek in my hand as I examined the candle. Solok quirked his eyebrow at me.

"Perhaps you should learn."

I smiled. "My grandfather attempted to teach me woodcarving when I was little, but I didn't have the patience. But now...I think I might take it up again. I remember what he taught me..."

I trailed off and looked into his eyes. He remained silent, and the candlelight made his gray eyes twinkle like I had never seen...the surrounding darkness combined with the candlelight put his features into soft relief, and I couldn't help but notice how attractive he looked, sitting there in the soft candlelight, his hands folded in the Vulcan style, his eyes smoldering into me, his lips curving upward into that soft, never-quite-there smile...

My romantic musings were broken off when someone rung a bell below, and one of the Hemak announced that dinner was ready to be served. Solok and I rose from our seats and joined a line of people on the upper level, slowly moving toward a buffet table. Even though there were meat options available, I only chose vegetarian items, as was my habit now. Five months with the Vulcans had dimmed my love of meat. So with a plate piled high with greens and fruit, I returned with Solok to our table. A few of the surrounding tables became occupied, but even so, there was enough room between tables that our little space was still private.

Solok glanced at my plate, and his lips twitched upward.

"You don't have to eat vegetarian here, Tia."

I smiled. "I'm not in the mood for meat. Besides...I never ate much of it as a child anyway. Mom always made _mole_, but I'd skip the chicken and go straight for the sauce."

_(AN: This is not referring to the animal or facial marking, but to a dish served in Mexico. It is pronounced 'mow-lay')_

Solok raised his eyebrows. "I'm not familiar with that dish...please, enlighten me."

"Well..._mole _is...complicated to explain..."

I lectured him on chile peppers and every other ingredient that I remembered putting in my mother's _mole_. Although my ancestors took entire days to make this stuff, my family could usually put together a paste in about two hours. It was still labor intensive, but it was always worth it. I recalled my first time making _mole _on my own, and I told him the story.

"I burned the bottom a little, but my mother said she was impressed," I said with a nostalgic smile. "But now, I could make _mole _with my eyes closed...maybe I should make you some."

He shook his head. "No, I think not."

"Why not?" I protested, frowning. "I know Torik said human food doesn't always agree with Vulcans, but it wouldn't hurt to try it."

"Vulcans and chocolate," he murmured, leaning forward, "don't mix."

I stared at him incredulously. "Chocolate? What's wrong with it?" 

Solok closed his eyes briefly before answering. "Chocolate contains certain chemicals that can make a Vulcan...intoxicated."

I continued to stare. "It makes you drunk?"

"I believe I just said that, Ms. Valentin."

I laughed a little at his Vulcan knack for pointing out the obvious, and I shook my head. "Chocolate is only a background ingredient. And I know there are _moles _out there that don't contain chocolate."

He nearly smiled. "If you insist, I will try this dish. You've lived on our cuisine for five months without complaint. It would only be fair for me to try some of yours."

I simply smiled and he changed the subject. He didn't have to tell me to keep my mouth shut about what he had just told me; I knew by now that, in the wrong hands, that information could be used for less than honorable intentions. We chatted about casual things until the waiters returned and cleared the tables. I noticed several of the Hemak congregating on the dance floor below us, and the two of us joined the other guests at the railing in order to see better.

I couldn't help but tap my toes and shake my hips a little at the intense drum beat in the music. Solok stared at me in slight amusement, but I knew I wasn't the only one dancing at the music. The Hemak were extraordinary dancers, their movements powerful and sturdy and yet fluid and graceful. I had done a little research and I knew the ancient Hemak were a mountain people, dwelling deep in their stone hallows. The steady, pounding beat pulsed with the mountains' heart, throbbing, calling me to dance. I understood the urge, though Solok might have not, as I came from a mountain region myself. I knew the call of the stony hills, the plummeting valleys and winding trails, the deep, sacred caverns untouched by man.

The Hemak finished their dance and invited the guests to dance out on the floor, and several of the people around us accepted, abandoning the railing to go dance with friends or spouses. Others returned to their tables, preferring conversation to the call of the music. Although I would have liked to dance, Solok invited me out into the garden to walk with him, and I didn't refuse him. Soon we were surrounded by trees and flowering vines instead of pillars and people. I breathed in the fresh night air and smiled; I could almost smell the mountains in the distance.

"The air is refreshing, isn't it?" Solok commented lightly. I nodded.

"It smells like home."

"Like _mole_?"

I looked at him for a second in incredulity; he had actually made a joke! I laughed and shook my head.

"No, sir, like the mountains."

He quirked an eyebrow in acknowledgment. "You have not told me about your home, though I have thoroughly described mine. And we are alone, so you may call me Solok."

We wandered along the winding pathways, past fountains and ponds and groves of fruit trees, and I told him about Oaxaca. I told him about the mountains and the rugged shoreline, the hikes I would take with my brothers, the first time I had tried surfing. He listened intently, and once I was done, silence fell between us.

"These gardens are quite extensive," he murmured after a while as we came to a bench. I sat down, and he followed suit.

"They're lovely. The Hemak have good taste."

"Their designs are whimsical," he replied softly, "but pleasing, yes."

We sat in silence for a while longer before he spoke.

"Have you thought more on my proposal, Tia?" he nearly whispered. I turned to him, and I felt that I had never seen him more vulnerable before.

"Yes, I have. I...still don't know what I'm going to do."

More silence. I knew I needed to start examining him, to ascertain how he felt about me so that if he did not return my affections, I would still have the chance to escape. I thought of something that I had not even thought about before, and the notion made my heart plummet.

"Solok?" I tried to keep my voice from trembling, and I thought I did rather well. He turned to me and raised an eyebrow.

"I know this may come off as a very personal question, but...are you married?"

I could tell he wasn't expecting that question, and both eyebrows rose quickly, almost disappearing behind his hair. "I do not have a mate, if that is what you are asking."

A few beats of silence passed before he spoke again. "Why do you ask, Tia?"

"You have not told me about your family, Solok."

He gave me a pointed look, but then sighed slightly and nodded. "Very well...my father is an instructor at the Vulcan Science Academy, where he teaches physics, though he is considering retirement. My mother served aboard the _Intrepid-A _for nineteen years before she resigned her commission. They both reside on Vulcan. I have a younger sister, who also teaches physics on the Vulcanis Lunar Colony. I was married for three months, two weeks and six days, but...she and I were not compatible. We have dissolved our relationship, and I do not know where she is now, nor do I care. It is not my concern anymore."

He seemed especially distant as he said those last few sentences, and I wanted to touch him, to let him know that I understood that it was hard for him to admit that to me. I felt I had to stroke his face, or hold his hand, or simply touch his shoulder to remind him that I was here; I had almost heard a hollow loneliness in his voice as he spoke of his ex-wife. I reached out and lightly touched his shoulder, and he turned to me abruptly, as if he had been lost in his own little world and had forgotten I existed, but his features softened slightly at the gesture I was making.

"Thank you for listening, Tia...I never thought I would ever meet someone like you. Never have I seen an outsider, much less a human, who is so willing to immerse themselves in our culture. Should you decide to leave us...your absence will be felt."

We sat for another hour or so in contended silence; talk seemed superfluous, so we abstained from it. I realized as I listened to the night that we were not very far from the door, that the garden path had nearly taken us full circle. I could hear the music streaming out of the doorway, and I recognized a popular Andorian waltz drift through the cool night air. I turned to Solok.

"Do Vulcans dance?"

He nearly smiled. "Only when we are very young...we are allowed to dance in elementary school, and the dances resemble those of the Orions, only less coordinated."

I tried my hardest not to laugh at the thought of him shaking his hips like an Orion slave girl, and I shook my head.

"And now that you're older?"

"No, we do not dance."

"That's a shame," I murmured.

Solok simply raised his eyebrows. "I was not very...coordinated or graceful as a child. I know my people have good reason for refraining from such activity. It is illogical."

I looked away so I could roll my eyes. "Well, I would hardly know that you weren't very graceful by the way you play volleyball."

I looked back and stared him in the eye, and he quirked an eyebrow.

"Maturity has been kind to me, I'm sure," he said simply, looking down. "Why do you ask these questions, Tia?"

I shrugged. "I was hoping to dance with you...but if you insist that Vulcans don't dance, I will respect that."

I smiled at him to let him know that I wasn't really surprised that he had refused me, but the smile turned into a confused frown as he stood and offered his hand to me. I took it, and he gently hauled me to my feet, then led me down the path, then through a space in the hedges to a small, deserted lawn. A fountain sang sweetly at the other side of the clearing, and we were surrounded by bushes on every side. He turned to me and held out his hand again.

The five moons of Hemak Prime made the clearing seem as bright as day, and the light shone on his sleek, black hair. He was standing there, tall, graceful, poised...waiting. I strode forward and took his hand.

He pulled me closer, causing my heart to pound in expectation, and he gently put his hand on my waist. I understood and placed my hand on his shoulder, all the while in awe that he would do this. He took my other hand in his and pulled me along as we took our first steps.

We danced around the fountain, and he made sure I wasn't closer than arms length away from him. Despite his claim to the contrary, he was very graceful, and I couldn't bring myself to look into his eyes as we continued the waltz. He would know everything, and that would be the end of me...the end of us.

"Tia."

I took the chance and looked up at him.

"I thought one was supposed to look into their partner's eyes as they danced."

I smiled slightly. "Sorry, I...I can't believe you're doing this for me," I said with a nervous laugh. He raised an eyebrow.

"I am only humoring you because I am certain you will not reveal this event to anyone."

I understood his point and obeyed his wish, continuing to stare deeply into his piercing gray eyes. His gaze thrilled me, slipping beneath my skin and embedding itself into my heart like a terrible, sweet thorn. I was glad Andorian waltzes were so long, as it gave me more time to look into his eyes and try and read how he felt about me. I told myself that the fact that he was willing to dance with me (albeit in a deserted place) was a good sign. I also noticed that with each consecutive spin outward, he drew me closer each time he pulled me back. Soon his warm, inviting hand was resting on the small of my back, and instead of arms length, we were mere inches apart. I could feel the heat of his body brush gently against mine, and I found myself wanting to kiss him senseless, then bury my head in his warm, strong chest. I never wanted this dance to end, so we could simply stay here in this labyrinth of hedges and fountains underneath the stars, getting closer and closer until we couldn't hope to break apart.

"Solok?"

"Yes, Tia?" I looked up at him, and his smoldering gaze nearly burned my skin.

"I think I've made my decision, sir."

"About my proposal? What have you decided?"

I sighed and sealed my doom. "I'm going to stay aboard the _T'Kumbra_, captain. It's where I feel the most at home."

He stopped our dance and tilted his head at me. "You feel at home aboard my ship?"

I nodded. "You and Torik have helped make it that way."

He cocked an eyebrow and nearly smiled. "That pleases me. I will contact Starfleet in the morning and make the arrangements."

Without further ado, he pulled me back into our dance, and the music swelled to a crescendo. It was almost surreal to be dancing a waltz with a Vulcan under the moonlight in a labyrinth of hedges, with the tinkling fountain and night birds singing along to the slow Andorian score. I felt like I was stuck in a scene out of _Alice in Wonderland_, and the music wasn't at all romantic. It was neutral, even dull in comparison to the music of my home. But still, we swayed and stepped in time to the beat, his arms engulfing me in their sensuous heat, my eyes glued to his. They gleamed at me in the moonlight, and once the song was over, he released me, stepping back quickly as if he had been caught stealing. But even so, I didn't really care. His actions were the most touching thing I had ever witnessed from him, and the way he had treated me tonight had almost undeniable romantic overtures to them. It made my heart pound as he stepped back up to me and lightly stroked my face with two fingers.

"Not a word to anyone," he murmured in a deep, gravelly voice. I refrained from gulping, then nodded.

The triumphant gleam in his eye returned for a moment, then he nodded back to me and left me stunned in the clearing. I waited until I couldn't hear his footsteps, then I stumbled over to the fountain and sunk down and sat on its edge. I wrapped my arms around my body, as his absence made me realize what a chill night it was tonight. A light spray of water misted onto my arm, and I stared at the reflected stars for a moment.

I felt an increasing need to be inside, felt obligated to let this little fantasy Solok had led me through to shatter. I needed to return to the real world, to mingle with others. I couldn't face the feelings that had risen up in me as he stroked my face, not here, not now. I was still alone, but in my quarters I was guaranteed privacy.

I stood up, straightened my uniform, then left the fairy-tale behind as I followed Solok's lead and returned to the party.


	10. Day 160: In the Wilderness

_**Disclaimer: See Chapter 1.**_

It seemed now that life aboard the _T'Kumbra _was as pleasant as it was painful five months ago. It seemed everyone had gotten over the initial news of having a human permanently aboard their ship and now were determined to make this change as smooth as possible. I noticed a sharp decrease in pointed comments from my superiors; instead I received more compliments. I felt deep down that this was Solok's doing, and it bemused me, and yet it was an exciting thought.

We played volleyball together regularly, at least twice a week. I played against Torik as well, but ever since he returned from his trip to Vulcan, he and I had become a little more distant than usual. We spent less time together, but he was still my dearest friend.

I sat quietly on the bleachers in the holodeck, occasionally taking a sip of water. I had finished stretching five minutes ago, and Solok still had not shown. He was the more punctual of the two of us, often beating me here. If he had a good excuse for being late or was unable to come, he would have contacted me by now.

Another five minutes passed. I took a sip of water.

Five more minutes.

"Computer, where is Captain Solok?"

"_Captain Solok is in his quarters._"

I stood up, gathered my things and headed toward the door.

…

I ran the buzzer twice before the door finally opened. I stepped inside, confused and slightly frightened at this point. The room was nearly pitch black, the only light coming from a few small candles burning on a table. It smelled heavily of some strange incense that almost made my head swim. I could barely see the outline of Solok's body seated silently on the other side of the low table.

"I'm afraid that I will not be able to play with you today, Ms. Valentin. Please excuse me." His voice was no more than a hoarse whisper in the dark, and I stopped myself from shivering. That voice was so hollow, so lonely, so stark that it made the hairs on my arms stand on end.

"If I'm interrupting anything, I'll go."

"Perhaps that would be best," came the hoarse reply. I considered asking if there was anything I could do for him, but thought better of it. Solok, for all his recent improvements, probably didn't want to accept my help. I turned to leave.

"Tia."

I turned back to him and saw the dark shadow stand and come forward. I could barely make out his features in the soft, dim candlelight, but I did notice bags under his eyes. I nearly winced at the sight; he looked exhausted, and I noticed a few strands of hair were out of place on his head.

"Are you all right, Solok?"

"I am fine, thank you." If I hadn't known better, I would have sworn he had just snapped at me. He sighed.

"I am all right, Tia. You do not need to worry about me," he repeated, his tone softer. "I need to inform you that tomorrow morning, you will accompany me and the Bolian ambassador to Gamma Phi Six for his negotiations."

I nodded. "Aye, sir. But...may I ask why I'm going?"

"The ambassador requested your presence. It is not unreasonable to assume that he desires more...emotional company than I can provide him. We will take the shuttle, as the _T'Kumbra _cannot negotiate the asteroid belt in the Gamma Phi system. 0800 in the shuttle bay. Dismissed."

I nodded, then strode quickly from his quarters. I didn't even think about what had happened, didn't let myself dwell on it until I was alone in my room. I laid down on the bed and frowned.

Something wasn't right with Solok. I had never seen a Vulcan display that much emotion (even such subtle emotion) in my six months aboard this ship. Solok would be the last one to let anything show, and yet I had heard traces of anger, irritation, and even despair in our short exchange. My perverse pleasure in scouting out his emotions had left me capable of seeing their little glimpses, but his emotions just then had been borderline obvious. But then, there was nothing I could do. A feeling deep in my gut told me not to report this to sickbay, that Solok could take care of himself.

Uneasy, but resigned to stay out of my captain's personal matters, I eventually drifted off to sleep.

…

The two hours passed by like molasses as the navigator skillfully guided the shuttle through the asteroid belt. The Vulcan bridge officer and Captain Solok sat at the helm, silent as stones as they worked. I sat in the back with the ambassador. The Bolian diplomat was cheerful and boisterous, and I could understand why Solok and the other Vulcan kept their distance. This man was the exact opposite of the calm Vulcan facade my colleagues wore, but he was opposite in a good way. He too asked me why I was accepting a permanent commission aboard the _T'Kumbra_.

"It's a long story," I said shortly, "but let's just say this is where I belong."

The ambassador nodded and changed the subject, and I was grateful. I didn't want to talk about my career right now. From the moment I had stepped into the shuttle bay, Solok had deliberately avoided my gaze. He mumbled out a 'good morning', but after that, he was cold and distant. I thought it might please him to see a human debating logic (and winning) against a skeptical Bolian, but he was seated tight at the helm, absorbed in his work. And maybe I was overreacting; after all, I still didn't know what had been wrong with him last night, or if it was still plaguing him this morning.

A thought popped into my head that I immediately banished: what if this was all a ploy? What if Solok, now that he had my permanent commission, had dropped the act and gone back to the way he was? Now that the six-month limit no longer existed, he was free to torment me at his leisure. And now the torment would be his absence, his distance. I could not live with that.

But I told myself no for two reasons: Solok was brilliant to be sure, but he wasn't that good. No one could feign being that genuine for three months, not even a Vulcan. And two, what about last night? I heard hollow regret in his voice after he had snapped at me, and I knew Solok was deep down a good person. I had to believe that, or else I would have locked myself into a cold, dark prison with no way out except to grovel to Solok and tell him that I had changed my mind. No, I told myself vehemently, Solok wasn't feeling well or something and that was none of my business.

I concentrated again on the ambassador and our conversation, determined to leave those depressing thoughts behind.

…

I opened my eyes and saw flickering light throwing soft patterns on a course gray material that was supporting my cheek. A siren screamed in my ear, and my ankle throbbed in pain.

I tried to jump up off the floor at the sound of the klaxon wails, but even as I got to my knees, I collapsed right back on the ground. I lifted my head an inch and saw blue blood trickling from the forehead of the Bolian ambassador; his eyes were glazed over, unmoving. Just to be sure, I felt for his pulse, but found nothing. I listened to his chest and heard nothing. I gave up and crawled toward the cockpit, and nearly threw up at the sight of the helmsman's nasty gash on his forehead. I checked his pulse and was met with silence. Praying harder than I ever had in my life, I turned to Solok. I started to cry when I noticed his chest rising and falling slightly; he was alive. I used the burned out helm as a support to haul myself to my feet, only to fall over again. Gritting my teeth, I tried again and managed. My vision blurred both by my tears and the black smoke that was slowly filling the cabin, I limped over to the captain and tried to lift him. I collapsed again, then realized I could not stand and haul a grown man at the same time.

I sat there for a minute as the smoke filled the cabin. I couldn't stand again lest I suffocate, besides, I couldn't stand up and hope to save the captain. I decided to crawl out, with the captain on my back. It would take some doing, but the adrenaline was already pumping through my veins, giving me the strength I needed to escape. Using every ounce of muscle I had, I dragged the captain onto my back, balanced him over my spinal cord, then, step by step, crawled out of the shuttle. His hands dangled over my back on the right, and his feet dragged the ground on the left. Flames danced around me, and I nearly screamed as a tongue of fire licked my arm. I jerked it away and the captain promptly slid off my back. It took a few minutes to readjust him, but I finally managed it. Two feet ahead, the shuttle door had opened in the crash. It felt like eternity before we made it out to the wind-swept sandy desert; I could hear the crackling flames even when we were twenty feet from the cabin. I realized the captain's shirt was on fire, and I slid him off of me and doused the flame with the amble sand. The sand was hot, but the air was cool, and two pale moons rose just above the horizon into the dark evening sky. I was grateful it was so cool outside, otherwise we would not survive. A dark line of mountains stretched on the horizon, and I knew we should head for those. In the mountains there might be water, or at least shade. Leaving the captain in the sand, I crawled back to the cabin.

Flames licked the walls, devouring the carpet and twisting the durable metal into a blackened, empty shell. The ration packs probably did not survive the fire, so I abandoned the shuttle in favor of making good time toward the mountains.

I waited about half an hour to get my bearings, sitting quietly as the captain laid in the sand, listening to the lonely, howling wind. I watched the shuttle burn into a hollow carcass, and I bowed my head in reverence for the Bolian ambassador and the helmsman. But my first priority was to get Solok and myself to safety.

I stood, wobbled a bit, then straightened myself again. But when I put weight on my left ankle, I immediately collapsed into the burning sand. It was either broken or sprained, I couldn't tell, and it explained the throbbing pain and the difficulty I had in standing. I heard a gentle moan from the captain and turned to him.

Gray eyes slowly opened, and they stared at me with a bleary, confused gaze.

"What happened?" Solok groaned as he sat up.

"We crashed. Molik and the ambassador-" A gut-wrenching sob escaped my throat before I could finish, but Solok gripped my wrist tightly.

"Ms. Valentin, now is not the time to be emotional. We will mourn their deaths when we have returned to the ship."

I nodded and dried my tears. "You see the mountain range over there? That's where I was going to drag you."

The captain turned and stared at the dark line on the horizon, then nodded.

"Yes, it would be logical to head there. We should leave a mark for the rescue teams so they can find us."

He looked around and noticed the burning shuttle, and several pieces of hull had broken off. Some scorched conduits lay amongst the rubble, and Solok fetched them and arranged them in an arrow, pointing toward the mountains.

He turned to me. "Do not waste time, lieutenant, let's move."

"If you help me, I will. My ankle is either sprained or broken."

I swore he nearly sighed in exasperation as he knelt down in front of me and removed my boot. I gritted my teeth to stop from whimpering, and he quirked an eyebrow as he felt my ankle.

"Only sprained, lieutenant. Come, I will help you."

He hauled me to my feet, and I draped an arm around his shoulders. We limped together toward the dark horizon, hoping water lay in the distance for our parched throats. Solok was fine though; his Vulcan physiology allowed him to go several days without water or rest, but I was not so lucky. I would die from thirst in three days, less in the desert heat. We needed to get to the mountains.

We limped along the path all night, and as the first rays of the sun lighted up the eastern horizon behind us, we came to the foot of the range. We rested gratefully in the shade of a boulder, and I took the time to glance over him and assess if he had any injuries. Other than a nasty bruise on his temple, he looked fine. I knew that the Bolian's body had cushioned my head from the hard floor. How Solok survived was beyond me, but I figured it was luck.

"Come," he croaked after ten minutes. "We need to climb these hills before the sun gets too high."

I obeyed, using the boulder as a support, and he came forward and we continued on our way. We searched the foot of the mountains first for openings, but found none. However, Solok spotted what looked like a cave about twenty feet above us, and we decided to head for it.

"I will carry you on my back," he explained. "Clutch my shoulders, I'm going to need my arms."

He crouched down a little, and I scooted over so that I was behind him, then wrapped my arms around his shoulders.

"Wrap your legs around my waist."

I obeyed, and he held my knees up. We began a gradual accent toward the cave, zigzagging up the stony face of the mountain. Any other man might have given up halfway, but Solok was stronger than a human, and his endurance was very impressive. He did not stop until we were at the mouth of the cave, at which time he let me off and helped me inside. We rounded a corner and found a narrow passageway, and once the growing daylight was out of sight, Solok helped me sit on the ground, then collapsed on the floor.

I quickly crawled over to him, and it wasn't until I brushed his sweat-drenched hair from his forehead that I noticed a thick gash at his hairline. It was slowly oozing green blood, and I tore off the cleanest part of my uniform and pressed it to the wound, and it seemed to help. I made to tuck some stray hairs back behind his ear, but when my fingertips brushed his skin, I gasped.

His skin burned with a fire that I had never felt before. His skin was usually warm, yes, but where it was usually a warm sidewalk, now it was a wild blaze. I frowned and let a few tears escape me; I did not know what ailed him, so I could not help. And he was fast asleep, unconscious from the loss of blood, so he could not help me help him either. The coolest thing I had was my skin, which was now drenched in sweat. I recalled that I had a tricorder strapped to my side, and I quickly whipped it out and scanned for water. A small stream trickled not one hundred meters further back in the cave, and I knew I had to fetch water, to cool him and to quench my now-unbearable thirst.

I stood, using the boulders as a guide, and thirty minutes later, my undershirt was soaked in water to cool Solok's forehead and body, and I had managed to drink some water at the stream. I would have to squeeze some out of my shirt for Solok to drink, but that wouldn't be too much of a problem once he was awake.

There was nothing now to do but wait.

_Next chapter: Solok's POV._


	11. Day 161: Fever

_**Disclaimer: See Chapter 1. As promised, Solok's POV.**_

I slowly drifted back to consciousness, and as I became aware of my surroundings, I was acutely aware of soft lips pressed to my forehead. As I continued to examine myself, I thought for a moment that I was free.

But no,_ it _was still there, raging in my gut, and her soft lips and cool breath on my skin made it roar to life. It was unsatisfied, stronger than yesterday, _hungrier_ than yesterday.

_Yes, _my gut moaned as she stroked my hair back from my forehead. _Yes, please. _My insides trembled, shivered in delight at the feel of her hand in my hair.

I quickly steadied my breathing, which had threatened to become uneven and ragged, then squeezed my eyes shut tighter before opening them.

Tia smiled wearily down at me. "You have a concussion and a fever. I think I've stopped the bleeding, but your fever won't go away."

"Mm," I murmured back, my voice no more than a croak. "Thank you for your medical attention, Ms. Valentin. But I must ask...why did you kiss my forehead?"

"For humans, the lips are one of the most sensitive parts of our bodies, more so than the back of the hand," she explained evenly. "I needed to see if your fever was going down, which it didn't...do you know what's wrong with you?"

I stared at her for a while and considered my options before answering. "Yes, and rest assured it is not contagious. Not to humans, anyway."

She nodded. "I hope you get to feeling better."

I bowed my head in reply. "As do I. You do not need to worry about me, Ms. Valentin. We have nothing to do but wait until we are rescued. If you don't mind, I would like to meditate for a while."

She nodded and moved to the other side of the passageway. "You won't even know I'm here."

_I highly doubt that_, I thought to myself as I folded my hands. I pressed my raised forefingers to my forehead and closed my eyes, trying to block the world out. But no matter how hard I tried, I could not focus my mind on any mantra. My thoughts dwelt on _her_,on how many steps it would take to reach her, on the exact amount of strength it would take to rip the clothes from her body. Ever since she had visited me in my quarters yesterday, I had been acutely aware of the distance between us. Last night's trek had been almost unbearable, with her arm draped around my neck and her ragged breathing in my ear. And carrying her up the mountain...her arms wrapped around me tight, her legs around my waist...I was loathe to let her go, but exhaustion from blood loss and my...condition had won out. But it was better that way, else I might have forgotten myself and made love to her then and there.

I opened my eyes when I heard her move, and I saw that she was kneeling in front of me, a torn piece of uniform in her hand.

"Your wound...its bleeding again."

I had been so focused on her and on not thinking of her that I hadn't even felt the slow trickle of blood down my forehead. She made to press the cloth to the wound, but my hand shot out and grabbed her wrist before she could blink. Her eyes found mine, and it tore at me inside to see the pain held in those warm, brown orbs. I slowly took the cloth from her and released her wrist, then tended to the wound myself. She quickly retreated to her place on the other side of the passageway.

She left me alone until night returned to the cave. I heard her shivering and opened my eyes again, and I hardly felt the sudden chill. But she was faring much worse than I, and when our eyes met, I opened my arms, inviting her to be warmed by what plagued me. The fever would keep her warm, at least. I resolved to be stronger than my carnal instincts as she gratefully moved toward me, but I found how difficult that would be as she nestled her nose into the crook of my neck. I wrapped my arms around her and leaned back against the hard rock. She adjusted herself as I leaned back, moving her head to rest on my chest, yet her cool breath did not ease the fever. It intensified it, and I threw myself back into my mantras.

The night passed slowly, and for the first time, I considered telling her about my condition, making her see how she had changed me. I hadn't missed the way she stared at me all those months, hadn't missed the prickle on my skin as her eyes examined me. I was sure she found me attractive, and the uncertainty in her eyes surely meant she was trying to determine my feelings toward her. Would it be so hopeless to tell her how I felt?

Ideas sprung to mind, crawled forth from the beastly voice that urged me to give in to the carnal pleasures of the _pon farr_. I obeyed the only harmless suggestion: I leaned forward and smelled her hair. Immediately, I closed my eyes, filing the smell away before it overwhelmed me. If she rejected me...she smelled of warm stone and some other scent I couldn't identify, but either way...it intoxicated me. It thrilled me, tantalized my senses, and I dug my fingernails into my thighs to stop my hands from ripping the clothes off her shivering body.

I moaned. The desire, the need I had for her grew with every passing second. Every hour that passed held a lifetime of torture, and it was driving me insane.

When the dawn crept back into the cave, she stirred, frowning at my chest until she remembered what had happened. She looked up at me, and her brown eyes seemed to pierce my skin.

"Good morning," I murmured.

"Morning," she mumbled, frowning at me. It was only then that I realized one of my hands had sneaked under her shirt and was resting on the small of her back, and the other was entwined in her hair. I hastily removed both and put my hands at my sides where they belonged.

"Forgive me, I...I do not recall how...forgive me."

She lightly pushed herself away from my chest until she was kneeling in front of me.

"Solok...what's wrong?"

I shook my head at her. "I cannot explain, Tia. No Vulcan could. It is...private."

She snorted. "I would really like to know why I woke up in your arms with your hands in places they shouldn't be."

"Tia, please, I told you, I cannot explain." My voice had risen to the edge of what was acceptable for a Vulcan.

"Why not?"

"If you understood what was going on, you would not dare question me about this!"

"Well, I don't understand. Why don't you enlighten me?" Her voice was more even than mine, and it ashamed me.

"Tia," I said softly. "For the sake of our friendship, please...do not question me further."

She stayed silent, and it seemed like she had dropped the subject for now. But eventually, she would have to know. I would have to confess my deepest secrets, my base desires...

"If you don't want to talk about it, I won't press you. But...just tell me if you need my help, ok?"

I managed a small smile. "I will do that."

She smiled back. "Did you sleep at all last night?"

I shook my head, and she frowned. "Ok...why don't you get some rest now and I'll take watch?"

I leaned further into the rock. "I will try. Thank you, Tia...I will...I will tell you about this...condition when the time is right."

Her gaze brightened ever so slightly. "Whenever you're ready. I'm here for you, you know that?"

Another small smile twitched my lips upward. "I do."

I closed my eyes, acutely aware that she had taken a seat beside me. Her hand brushed the hair off my forehead, presumably to check my wound; I did not stop her this time. Then after a moment, she tousled my hair playfully and removed her hand.

"Sleep well," she murmured, settling down. An hour passed in silence, and yet sleep was far from me. Her arm rested a mere two inches from mine, but I would not unfold my hands and invite myself to touch her. Not yet.

Finally, I could bear it no longer.

"Tia," I croaked. She looked at me, and I turned to her and unfolded my hands.

"What I am about to tell you must remain private," I began. "You saved my life, and...it is best that you know..."

She nodded and fully faced me, crossing her legs and giving me her undivided attention.

"Every seven years...mature Vulcans experience...a time of...illogic. The nuerochemistry in our brains becomes unbalanced, and if it is not corrected, it can be deadly."

The color nearly drained from her face. "Why didn't you tell me this earlier?"

I held up my hand, and she fell silent. "Please, let me finish...this imbalance is corrected by returning home and...taking a mate."

She frowned. "I don't understand."

I sighed. "This is the last remnant of our ancestry, the ancient drive to mate. It has plagued us, and we are, in truth, ashamed of this. It is a weakness in our race that we have had to deal with for thousands of years. The only cure is to take a mate, to engage in ritual combat, to experience extreme shock, or to meditate until the madness has passed."

"So you're saying that unless you..."

"Unless we copulate or choose another option, we will go insane and die."

She gasped. "I can see why you keep this private."

I nodded. "It is a time when our emotions are beyond our control. I believe I have already explained the implications to you."

She stayed silent for a while, and I could already feel her building walls against me.

"So how are you going to fix this?"

I bowed my head; why didn't she understand the heart of what I was trying to say? "Tia...perhaps now would be as good a time as any...I would like to declare _koon-ut so'lik_, my desire to become your mate."

She frowned. "Are you saying what I think you're saying?"

Another sigh escaped my lips. "The best human equivalent is a marriage proposal. I only ask that if you will not accept me, return to the shuttle, hide yourself from me lest I do something...unworthy of a Starfleet captain."

I bowed my head and waited for her to decide my doom. "Solok?" she murmured. I looked up at her after gathering my strength. Her eyes were shining with tears, and her soft lips were open as she gasped in air.

"You mean that?" she whispered. I nodded.

"I have come to admire you in a way that goes beyond friendship. When you came aboard my ship, I did everything I could to drive you away, and yet you stayed. You defied me, proved to me the worth of your people. Ever since then...I did everything in my power to make you stay. I did not realize the extent of my feelings until recently."

"How long is recently?"

"When you came to me after the Betac incident, and asked for council...I realized then how much I looked forward to spending time with you."

"And before that?"

I sighed. "As I said, I was trying to drive you away. I noted how uncomfortable you were in my presence, so I made more time between us to make your stay as uncomfortable as possible. My plan backfired when you defied me and showed me qualities desirable in a prospective mate..." I trailed off, uncertain. Surely she would hate me for admitting that I had tried to drive her off the ship.

"I thought it was odd that you liked to torment me so much," she murmured with a laugh. I winced; she did not realize how much those words hurt me now.

"That was wrong of me...I regret it every day now," I breathed, aware that she had moved closer to me.

A soft, tanned hand reached out and held my cheek, and I held back the lustful whimper that threatened to escape my lips, but I did lean into her touch. My eyes closed of their own accord, and I kissed the palm of her hand and murmured in satisfaction. The beast inside me roared for more, but I knew I had to restrain myself until she gave me her answer.

"So you're saying that because I displayed attractive attributes, you changed your opinion and plan for me?"

"Yes." My voice was no more than a hoarse whisper, as every muscle in my body was tensed for her answer.

"You changed for me?"

"_Yes_," I moaned. Several beats of silence passed as I waited with bated breath for a response.

Warm, soft lips were suddenly pressed to mine, and I breathed in sharply. The carnal beast inside me clamored in approval, and I clutched her to my body as if she were my lifeline. She _was _my lifeline, my salvation. My hands entwined themselves in her long, black hair, and my other hand pressed desperately and possessively to her face. Too soon, she pulled away, but I did not remove my hands.

"Solok of Vulcan," she whispered, tracing my left ear with a gentle, loving finger, "I accept your proposal."

The beast roared in victory, and I claimed her lips for myself before she could say another word. Sweet, beautiful relief settled over me, and I gave my body over to the throes of _pon farr. _My fingers, now beyond my control, violently yet deftly unzipped her uniform jacket and tore the undershirt from her body. She did not resist me, rather, she assisted me, then took off my clothes. Her warm hand trailed down my chest, and I moaned. I broke off the kiss and stared in amazement at her hand as it traced the outline of my toned muscles, then my eyes found hers again.

I pushed her down onto the cave floor, gripping her wrist and pinning her arm above her head. I kissed her again, fiercer than I had ever kissed T'Kara, and I explained the dangers she might face in the next few hours between each kiss.

"I should warn you...that I may...get violent...you know how...Vulcan emotions are..."

"I know," she breathed back as I moved on to her neck. "But I'd rather take a few punches than have you die...I don't want you to die..."

My fingernails dug into her arms as my teeth grazed her skin. Each consecutive kiss was fiercer, hungrier, and soon I was biting her skin over and over. But to my pleasure, she seemed to like it. Her hands, now free from my grip as I explored her bare skin, wandered gently over my back. She traced my spinal cord several times, and I recalled that hers was less pronounced than mine. Her hands came to rest on my rib cage, and my heart pounded against her fingertips. I moaned as she teased my skin, and in response, I bit down on her skin so hard that I tasted metallic blood.

She yelped and dug her fingers into me, but I only moaned again and continued to roughly caress her neck. But I broke away after a few more moments and gazed into her eyes, hardly believing the reality I was living. With strength I didn't expect from her, she flipped me onto my back and kissed me hard. Now it was my turn to explore her back, and my feverish hands crawled over her smooth skin. Her hair fell forward and engulfed me, and I was again overwhelmed with its aroma.

_Chocolate._

Suddenly, I recalled smelling a chocolate bar on Earth, back when I was a cadet, and I remembered that the smell was pleasant, if not a little too sweet for my tastes. But she smelled just like that intoxicating substance, and the scent filled my nose. I groaned and pulled her down into a violent kiss, and the warmth of her hair surrounded me. Her hand ran over my exact, black haircut, and she chuckled into my mouth.

"What is it?" I murmured with a slight grin when she pulled away. She tousled my hair again and smelled it, causing my grin to widen.

"I've always wanted to feel your hair," she whispered, laughing. "And by the way, you have the sexiest grin I've ever seen."

I laughed back at her, and we laughed together as the heat between us increased to a crescendo, and our bodies became one.

A cool breeze caressed my skin as I held my lover against my heaving chest. My hand wandered freely over her body, and I realized something was still missing. I glanced down at her and smiled.

"Tia," I murmured, and she looked up at me.

I acted on instinct, slowing raising my hands and cupping her face, and she gasped in surprise. It felt imperative not to let go, and her expression faded from one of fear and surprise into one of happiness and understanding. I began to pour myself into her, and her thoughts became clear to me. I began to understand emotion, to understand humanity, and I was open to ideas I had never thought possible. I felt a rush of heat all over my body, and it dawned on me that this telepathic mating bond brought us closer than any physical act ever could.

Tears streamed down my cheeks; I felt _whole_, complete, and it was unlike anything I had felt in years. The incompatibility, the uncertainty that lay with T'Kara was no longer there. Tia gave herself over to me, and we became one, body and mind. I didn't even realize what we were doing until I removed my hands, but we gave ourselves to each other until exhaustion made us curl up together on the cool stone floor.

…

I awoke and sighed in relief that the beast had crawled back into his cave, that I would not encounter him for another seven years. My chest was still warm, though, and I breathed in deeply as I realized Tia was resting on my bare chest. We were both naked, lying on the hard rock floor of the cave, and a small shaft of morning sun crept through a crack in the cave ceiling. I turned my attention back to Tia, who was still fast asleep in my arms. Black bruises were beginning to form on her wrists, and a violent bite mark marred her smooth neck. I held her tighter to my body and lightly kissed her neck, and she stirred. Her warm brown eyes lit up when she turned to me, and a brilliant grin brightened her face.

"Hey, _cari__ñ__o_...what time is it?"

"1400, approximately."

"What, no Vulcan precision today?" she murmured with a laugh.

"Humans find it irksome," I replied. Her eyes glinted playfully.

"Not this human," she growled, capturing me in a sweet kiss before I could reply. Two of her fingers reached up and stroked my face, which surprised me.

She laughed as I quirked my eyebrow. "Isn't that how Vulcans display affection?"

A small smile twitched my lips upward. "Yes."

We dressed and sat together in contented silence, and, as if waiting for their cue, a rescue party arrived thirty minutes later, and before we knew it, we were sitting in her quarters, talking over a game of _kal-toh_.

"I promised my parents that I would visit them after my six-month commission here. I was going to explain to you soon, but..."

I nodded. "I understand. And you are free to take whatever leave time you need."

"Well...I'd like you to come with me."

I raised both eyebrows.

"They'd like to meet the man I'm going to marry. I promise we won't make _mole_."

I shook my head and nearly smiled. "As you wish, Tia. When did you plan on leaving?"

"Next week."

I nodded and we continued our game. I wasn't too concerned with this meeting, in fact, I was more concerned about presenting her to my parents. My father had taught me everything I had ever thought about humans, and I realized now how wrong he was. But I wasn't going to turn back now, not after pursuing Tia and the torment I had endured. My parents would accept her as their daughter-in-law. My father would be impressed with such a logical human as she, and it was logical to accept that if I had to marry a human, I would marry one such as Tia.

He would see. He would have to see, because I was bonded to her and I would have no other.


	12. Day 166: Oaxaca

_**Disclaimer: See Chapter 1. Back to Tia's POV.**_

The ship mourned the loss of their helmsman, but their grief was so subtle that I hardly noticed it. It wasn't that the crew was lacking in efficiency now (as if Solok would tolerate it), but I noticed a little less talk than normal, more distant glances, as if the ship were taking several deep breaths.

But somehow this subtle display of grief was comforting, and I told Torik so as we walked in the observation deck.

I carefully relayed a little of what had happened after the crash to him, and a knowing look entered his eyes as I went on with my story. I told him about carrying Solok out of the shuttle on my back and the trek through the desert and up the mountain, but then I stopped.

"And?" he asked, turning to me. But I remained silent, not daring to betray Solok's trust.

"Ah," he murmured, "it is a private matter."

I nodded slowly, then smiled.

"Did he declare _koon-ut so'lik_?"

My smile turned into a giddy grin, and I laughed. Torik let one of his tiny smiles grace his lips, and he touched me lightly on the shoulder.

"I am pleased...for you both. I had a feeling that such an occurrence might happen, but...there are times when it is best to keep silent."

"Words to live by...wait, you knew?"

He raised his eyebrows. "I suspected, Tia. Nothing more."

I nodded. "He was being way too nice to me...I knew something was up, but I didn't dare let myself believe..." I trailed off, then smiled. "But he's a Vulcan. Can I really blame myself for not knowing?"

"Do you require an answer to that question?"

I chuckled. "No, Torik, I don't. The fact is he's mine now, and I'm his. I just hope he can stand my family..."

I turned to him and laughed at his expression. "They're a fun bunch, but to a Vulcan, they might be a little overwhelming. I'm trying to pick a day where it'll only be Mamá and Papá, but with them, you never know who's going to drop in to say hello."

"I have a feeling that Solok will tolerate a lot on your behalf," he replied gently. "I do not think there is any cause for you to worry."

I stared at him for a minute, then smiled. "That means more to me than you know, Torik. Thank you."

…

The bag I was carrying bumped against the small of my back with every step I took down the shady road. Solok strode confidently beside me, and I looked around with wistful nostalgia at everything around me. I was home again, and not much had changed in the time I had been gone. The white pines lined the road like steadfast soldiers, spaced between the cyrilla and willow bustic that grew by the wayside. Palm trees sprouted tall near the low, white adobe house in the distance. The sandy gravel crunched loudly beneath our feet, and I noticed a figure bent over in the garden that grew in front of the house.

When I got closer, the figure stood, and I recognized my cousin.

"Solidad! _Buenos tardes!_" I called to her, quickening my pace. She turned to me and smiled widely. Her long black hair was pulled back into a braid, much like mine. Her high cheeks were flushed from working in the garden, and she quickly wiped sweat off her forehead before embracing me.

_(AN: See translation at end of chapter. This is just an opportunity for me to practice some Spanish.)_

"_Buenos tardes, Tia! __¿__Qu__é__ tal?_"

"_Bien, bien...mi mam__á__, __¿__donde est__á__?_"

"_All__í__, en la casa._"

"_Gracias, Solidad_..." I turned to Solok, who had been looking around at the property. I gestured him over and quickly introduced him as the captain that he was. My mother knew I was bringing someone special to meet her, but I hadn't mustered the courage to tell her that I was getting married. He shook my cousin's hand, then expressed interest at examining my mother's flower bed. I took that as a sign that he was giving me a minute to talk to my cousin without him in earshot, and I appreciated it.

"_É__l es vulcano...__¿__como estabas en la _T'Kumbra_?_"

"_Bien, chica. Es fantastico_."

"_Espero que s__í__, Tia_."

I smiled and shook my head. "_¿__Nos vemos pronto en la casa?_"

"_S__í__, en...cinco minutos._"

"_Bueno, voy a hablar con mi madre._ _Nos vemos en un momento, __Solidad_."

I called Solok back over, then led him to the door. My mother was expecting me, but even so, I knocked. After a minute of tedious waiting, I finally heard her footsteps and the door opened.

My mother's face was a little more lined than when I saw her, and her black hair was streaked with gray. But even so, the beautiful woman who raised me smiled brightly at the sight of me, and I embraced her before she could even say hello. She buried her nose in my hair and held me tight, then broke away and looked me over. After a few moments of examining me, she turned her attention to my companion, who bowed his head in solemn but sincere greeting.

"Captain, I'd like you to meet my mother, Alejandra Valentin. Mamá, this is Captain Solok of the _T'Kumbra_. He's the special someone I told you I wanted you to meet."

Her brow furrowed momentarily at that, but she gave him a welcoming smile and held out her hand. He shook it, his face calm and serene, almost pleased, and he followed me inside. A breath of cool air hit me as I walked through the front hallway to the kitchen in the back, but I stopped at the entrance to the living room and put my bag down. I slowly approached the man reading a book in the armchair near the window, and he glanced up at me at my approach.

He smiled. "Tia," he murmured, setting down his book and standing to hug me. Once he broke away, he examined me like my mother did, then clapped me on the shoulder. Only then did he notice Solok, and he raised his eyebrows at him.

"I thought I heard that a captain would be visiting us. Tia, would you mind introducing me?"

"Papá, this is Captain Solok of the _T'Kumbra_. Captain, this is my father, Jorge Valentin."

My father grinned. "Well, you're the first Vulcan I've had the pleasure of welcoming into my home. Why don't you sit down and tell me about your ship? Tia, your mother wants to talk to you."

I gave Solok an encouraging glance when Papá turned around to sit in his chair, and the captain nodded to me in return. He took a seat on the couch and I walked down the hallway to the kitchen. My aunt Rosita was deep in conversation with my mother at the kitchen table, but once I walked in, they both stopped and my aunt stood to greet me.

"Tia, welcome back home. How have you been?" she said warmly, giving me a hug.

I took a seat at the table and smiled. "I've been great! Life aboard the _T'Kumbra _has been quite an experience."

"I've read some of your messages and it sounds like its been interesting. But Tia...why did you bring the captain to meet us?"

I gave her a look that demanded that we go to a private place to talk, and she followed me to my old bedroom. I had painted the room green a long time ago, and the woven blanket was still spread across the bed. I sat on the edge of it and waited for my mother to close the door, and she sat down beside me, taking my hand.

"You're thinking about marrying this man, aren't you?" she murmured softly with a smile. I couldn't help but smile back, and I sighed.

"I'm not thinking any more. I am going to marry him."

She sighed and pulled me closer so that my head was resting on her shoulder. "_Felicitaciones, Tia..._I'm happy for you both."

"Then why don't you sound like it?"

She was silent for a few moments. "Because I'm losing my baby girl to a Vulcan I've never met."

I wrapped my arms around her waist and buried my face into her shoulder. "Do you trust me, mamá?"

"_S__í__, por su puesto._"

"Then trust me when I say that when you get to know him, you'll like him. He's saved my life three times."

"What?"

I sat back up and stared at her sincerely. "You heard me. He saved me from bandits, he saved me from drowning..."

Her eyes grew wide. "Tia, you're scaring me..."

"Starfleet is dangerous sometimes, mamá," I said quickly, "but you can be positive that with Solok around, I won't come to harm. He...he loves me too much to ever let that happen."

My mother smiled, but grief still clouded her warm brown eyes. "How long will you two be staying?"

"We'll leave tomorrow night."

"And when will you get married?"

I sighed. "Probably when the _T'Kumbra _gets near Vulcan again, I guess. We haven't discussed it."

"I won't miss my daughter's wedding, no matter when it is. Call me when you decide and I'll get on the next transport to Vulcan."

I laughed. "I wouldn't dream of getting married without you there, mamá. I'll contact you, don't worry."

We stayed in my room for a while, silent, contemplating this new step in my life, when we heard a soft knock at the door. I called for them to come in, and Solok entered the room and glanced around the room. Then he turned his attention to my mother.

"Mrs. Valentin, your husband would like to talk to you," he said politely, stepping away from the door so she could pass. But when she stood, she did not walk out the door. She crossed her arms and looked Solok up and down, and I knew she wasn't looking at this man as a stranger, but rather sizing him up as her future son-in-law. I couldn't read too much about how she felt about him, but I could see the _so you're the man who captured my daughter's heart, keep it well or I'll break your neck _look in her eyes. After a minute she nodded politely to him and gave me a knowing glance before exiting the room. She was kind enough to close the door when she left, and Solok walked over and took my mother's place on the bed.

"I talked to your father," he began, raising an eyebrow. "I do not believe he trusts me."

"Don't worry, he'll come around. I'm his baby girl and of course he's not going to trust you at first. But when he realizes how much I love you...he'll see."

I swore I almost saw him smile, and in a move that surprised me, he leaned forward and gave me a brief kiss on the lips. His soft mouth was so warm and inviting as it pressed to mine for those short seconds, and I closed my eyes, longing for more of him. But instead I simply rested my head on his shoulder, and he pulled me closer and wrapped his arm around my waist.

"What I wouldn't do for a thousand of those kisses..." I murmured softly into his shirt. He gripped me tighter for a moment, then lifted my head up and pierced me with his intense gaze.

"You would give me your heart?" he whispered, his eyes glinting teasingly. I grinned.

"Anything you want," I whispered back. His eyes glittered in triumph, and he took his first two fingers and wrapped them around mine. I recognized the Vulcan version of holding hands and I smiled into his shirt.

"I may not have expressed it directly," he murmured, pulling me closer so that I was half in his lap, "but you are a very attractive woman." His fingers trailed lightly up my thigh, and I gasped and stared at him incredulously. He simply quirked an eyebrow at me, and I narrowed my eyes.

"You are asking for it," I growled mischievously with a grin.

Both eyebrows were raised. "Asking for what?"

I took hold of the front of his shirt and pulled him forward, kissing him hard on the lips. His intake of breath was quick but controlled, and he reciprocated eagerly to my kiss. That only made me want him more, but I pulled away and nestled myself against him. He kissed the top of my head and continued to caress my thigh, and we stayed still and silent until my mother called us for dinner.

_Translation:_

Solidad! Good afternoon!

-Good afternoon, Tia! How are you?

Good, good...my mother, where is she?

-There, in the house.

Thank you, Solidad.

…

-He's Vulcan...how have you been on the _T'Kumbra_?

Fine, girl. It's fantastic.

-I hope so, Tia.

I'll see you in a bit in the house?

-Sure, in...five minutes.

All right, I'm going to talk with my mother. See you in a bit, Solidad.

…

-Congratulations, Tia. I'm happy for you both.

…

Do you trust me, mamá?

-Yes, of course.


	13. Day 167: Bonds

_**Disclaimer: See Chapter 1.**_

I tossed and turned under the thin sheets, burying my head into my pillow. Dinner had not been the fiasco that I thought it might have been, but I wasn't blind to the growing tension between Solok and my father. I would have to talk to him in the morning and convince him that his baby girl was a woman, free to make her own choices. I knew my family had absolutely nothing against the Vulcans, but I had a feeling that my father would have accepted Solok much better as simply my commanding officer, not my future husband. I would also have to make a point to talk to my fiance about our wedding date...

I turned over again and tried to relax, but no matter how much I tried, I couldn't get comfortable. I was tired and my body wanted to sleep, but my mind would not stop whirring and churning. I felt empty for some reason, restless. I wished Solok was here instead of across the hall; I had noticed over the past week that I always felt calmer when he was around. I began to wonder why that was, but I was too tired to analyze anything right now. I finally drifted off into an uneasy sleep.

…

I awoke in darkness, and it took me a moment to realize where I was. I relaxed when I remembered that I was in my old bed on Earth. I tried to remember what I had been dreaming about, but all I could recall was that Solok was in it somehow, or maybe I was looking for him...

I shook my head and glanced over at the console. _0104_. I sighed and buried my head into my pillow, hoping to fall back asleep quickly. But sleep was far away, and I turned over again.

I heard my door open, then close, and then soft footsteps made their way across the carpet to my bed. I turned over just in time to see Solok slip into bed beside me, dressed only in gray shorts. I smiled as he wrapped his arms around me and pulled me close, and my body and mind felt utter relief at his presence.

"Hey," I whispered, stroking his face with two fingers. Solok closed his eyes and breathed out contentedly, letting my fingers roam over him. I traced the outline of his ear, inducing a soft moan.

"_Mi __á__ngel, _ever since the cave, I've felt this growing need to be near you. Just now, you walked into the room and all my frustration just melted away. What is this?"

I looked into his eyes and saw satisfaction staring back at me.

"I too have felt it. It is simply the bond between us, its longing for proximity."

I raised my eyebrows. "I accepted..._something_ from you back at the cave. I knew it was you, your spirit or whatever, but could you explain it to me in more detail?"

He nodded and his eyes glinted in the faint moonlight filtering through the window. "You and I are now telepathically connected. It enabled my _pon farr_ to end in satisfaction, and now you are bound to me, and I to you. This bond allows me to..." he glanced up at me, "_feel_. I can experience emotion through you without losing control. I can offer you calm and logic when you need it, and you in turn can let me share in your happiness, sorrow, anger. We are one, Tia."

A tear trickled down my cheek. "That's...wonderful," I breathed, unable to express myself in words. That almost-smile of his returned, and he nodded.

"There are no words to describe it. It is the foundation, the hallmark of intimate relationships between Vulcans. Here, allow me to demonstrate."

I was suddenly filled with inexplicable calm, and my thoughts began to organize themselves logically. All of my frustrations over my father and nervousness over what this marriage might bring disappeared. I reached out and stroked his face again as understanding filled me to my core, and I sighed in contentment.

"My control and logic are now yours, but if you wish..."

I gasped as heat spread from my head to my toes, and my eyes widened in surprise. Every inch of me burned with desire for him, and my breath became uneven. He cocked an eyebrow at me, and his eyes gleamed in triumph. With a simple push, I was on my back, and before I could blink he was on top of me, his lips pressed urgently to mine.

I moaned into his mouth, raising my hand to continue the two-fingered stroke, and he did the same to me. Wherever his fingertips touched my skin, it prickled and became hot, and I gently moved his hand lower to my torso. Instead of just two fingers, his hand caressed my skin from my ribs to my hips, igniting a fire as he made his way downward. The tingling, throbbing sensation caused me to arch my back, and I heard him murmur in satisfaction. His kiss grew deeper, and my growing desire flared like a torch. He trailed his kisses ever so lightly down to my neck, then increased the intensity once again, using his teeth and tongue to caress my burning skin.

"Yes," I gasped, digging my fingernails into his back. My breathing, already ragged, came in great gasps, and I placed my hot palm on his cheek. Something as simple as a kiss on the neck should not be getting me this worked up. Solok stopped and set his gray eyes on me, and they gleamed in triumph.

I realized he had been using the bond to increase the intensity between us, and I grinned. He had just revealed a darker, playful side of him that I was eager to explore, but he shook his head.

"I will teach you how to use this bond as I just did," he whispered, pressing his forehead to mine and trailing two fingers along my collarbone. "But not tonight. It is late, and you and I must sleep if we are to get up early."

I frowned. "What are you talking about?"

His eyes glittered, almost in amusement. "Have you forgotten our traditions already, Tia?"

"Oh!" I breathed, remembering that he was a guest in this house, and technically, so was I. "Well, you've done a good job of getting me worked up."

He almost smiled. "I can remedy that."

He returned to my neck, but his kisses were soft, soothing even. I felt my eyelids droop, and a lazy smile graced my lips. His warm and gentle hand followed the curves of my body, then slipped beneath me to the small of my back. My limbs relaxed, and I lost myself in the feel of his lips against my skin until I drifted off to sleep.

…

Someone was shaking my shoulder vigorously, and I moaned in protest. I had been having a wonderful dream, and my bed was so warm...something warm and soft was pressed to my belly, and it started to move. Blindly, I reached out and tried to pull it back, but something grabbed my wrist. Then soft lips pressed hard to mine and I moaned again, not in protest but in approval.

I knew it was him without even opening my eyes, and I sighed as he pulled away.

"Five more minutes of that," I breathed, opening my eyes and staring into his mischievous glance. His eyes glinted.

"I had a feeling you would find it difficult to rise this early," he murmured, throwing the covers off my body. "But you have shown me some...unconventional ways of rousing oneself."

Without preamble, he worked his arms under me and lifted me off the bed, then twisted me so that he was holding me like a child in his arms. I wrapped my legs around his waist to prevent myself from falling over, and I clung tightly to his shoulders.

"What are you doing?" I hissed with a grin. He simply kissed me in reply, his arms holding me in a sturdy grip. Finally, after a long, slow kiss, he pulled away.

"I am attempting to rouse you," he responded, though I had forgotten what I had asked in the first place.

I sighed in satisfaction and stroked his hair. "Is it too late to ask for ten minutes?"

His eyes gleamed. "Come, we should begin preparing breakfast."

I led him through the hallways and into the kitchen, and I looked back at him once I noticed the darkness outside the windows.

"What time is it?"

"0445," he replied smoothly. I yawned and crouched down to retrieve a pot from the lower cabinets. Solok ordered ingredients from the replicator and we began to make the traditional Vulcan breakfast of _plomeek _broth. We prepared the spicy version, and the sun slowly peeked into the kitchen, casting long, dim shadows across the stone floor.

"You two are up early."

We both turned at my father's voice, and I smiled and stepped forward to give him a good-morning hug.

"We made _plomeek_," I murmured as I embraced him. He exhaled in a huff.

"Never tried it," he replied, "but it sounds wonderful."

"Trust me, _pap__á_, you'll love it."

"Is it done yet?"

I shook my head. "It still needs about twenty more minutes to cook."

"Well, if your fiancé will watch over it, I'd like to talk to you."

He nodded toward the back door and I followed him into the backyard. The back of the house was set on a slight slope, so I stepped down off the covered porch and walked with him. The brown grass crunched beneath our feet, and we followed the sandy path into the fields beyond the yard.

"Why are you marrying him?"

I paused. "Because I love him."

"Your mother and I talked about him last night. We're not sure what to think."

"I brought him here so you could meet him."

"He seems like a nice man, but I can't help but wonder if you're making a mistake. Think of your future, Tia."

I stopped and turned to him. "Do you think that just because he's Vulcan means that he won't love me?"

He sighed. "Yes, that's what I fear."

"Then don't. He loves me, _pap__á. _I know it."

"How? Has he told you?"

I shook my head. "I can feel it."

"How, Tia? In the way he looks at you? In his touch? I need reassurance, _hija_."

I smiled. "In all those ways and more."

"You're absolutely sure that ten years or even fifty years from now, you won't regret making this decision?"

"_Papá_," I said slowly, "fifty years from now, I'll be smiling down at my great-grandchildren, and my husband will be there by my side. I love him. I'm his and he is mine, and it will be that way until I die."

"You're sure?"

"_Pap__á_...I'm already his."

His face darkened, but I smiled to belay his comment. I carefully explained the nature of the bond we shared, and I could see my father frown more and more as I continued talking.

"So he controls you now?" he hissed, and his eyes flared in anger.

"No! No, we share thoughts with each other. He'll teach me more about this once we go back to the ship."

He remained silent as we walked on. "I don't exactly understand this bond you're talking about, and I'm still not sure what to think of the captain. But you're a young woman now, and you're free to make your own choices."

"When you get to know him, you'll see."

He smiled, and although it was small, it was genuine. "I believe you, _hija_. But mark my words, if he ever makes you miserable, I don't care how strong he is, your uncles and I will give him a beating he won't forget."

Despite myself, I laughed. "You won't have to, _pap__á_. I'll beat him up myself."

He laughed and we walked back to the house.


	14. Day 180: Wedding Bells

_**Disclaimer: See Chapter 1.**_

"Close your eyes and open your mind."

I looked into Solok's piercing gray eyes, then obeyed. We were in my quarters, on my bed. One of his hands was entwined in my hair, and the other was wrapped under my back. I was wearing nothing but my uniform undershirt and underwear, and he was bare-chested.

I focused on the itch in the back of my mind that plagued me when he wasn't near me, then on the relief that I felt when he was close. I saw darkness in front of my eyes, then it was like a tunnel of light opened between us. I could feel his presence like a ghost in my mind, and I smiled.

"Good," I heard him murmur. _Now tell me what to do._

I could hear the second sentence as clearly as the first, as if he had whispered it in my ear, but it echoed in my mind as well. I focused hard on trying to enter his mind, and after much effort, I finally succeeded. I moved through the tunnel of light and found layer upon layer of organization, and I barely touched him, but I was there.

_Kiss me_, I called out in his mind. Pleasure, like a spark, passed between us and I could hear him moan softly outside in the real world.

_As you wish_.

His warm, soft lips pressed fiercely to mine, and I nearly lost focus on keeping the bond open, but he forced it back to where it was when I began to falter.

_No matter what I do, you must concentrate._

_-You said intimacy would make this bond stronger._

_It will, Tia._

Desires and thoughts flew between us, like birds between branches of a tree. I traced the tip of his ear with a gentle finger, and he kissed my neck. With two fingers, I stroked his face, and he fingered the hem of my underwear. As he explored my body with his fingers, he explored my mind as well. Although at first I was reluctant to let him in, I eventually let down my guard.

_My voice was one of the first things that attracted you to me?_

_-Yes._

_Fascinating._

I focused on the outside world for a brief moment and realized he had stripped both of us naked. He pressed against me and I moaned, then I was sucked back into my mind.

His lips claimed mine again, then he was in me, in my body and in my mind. His thoughts intertwined with my thoughts, and we joined together in a new way. The effort it took to keep our bond open was lessening with every move he made. My voice seemed stolen from me, but I screamed out his name in my mind. It was a cacophony of sound and color and thoughts and feelings, but the only physical sound I heard was our ragged breathing.

_If you need to vocalize, these walls are thick._

I screamed into his mouth, and then it was finished. My cheeks were slick with tears, and I gasped for breath, too tired to say anything.

"I never knew a bond like this would be so strong with a human."

"Solok..." I whispered weakly, stroking his face. He pressed his forehead to mine.

"If you want me to stay with you, I will. But you need to sleep."

I laughed. "Is that an order, captain?"

His eyes twinkled and he moved off me, gathering me into his arms. I laid my head on his chest and drifted off to sleep.

…

Solok opened the door to the house for me, then led me to a bedroom in the back where he placed his bags. I set mine beside his, then followed him back to the communal area, where there was a small kitchenette and what looked like a living room, with two covered bench-like pieces on a raised platform. It felt very Zen, very Vulcan. I smiled as I leaned against the cabinet and looked at the artwork on the walls. I saw an IDIC made of metal on the opposite wall, and then my gaze returned to the living area.

_I could raise a child here_, I thought to myself. _We'd have to do something about the edges of that platform, but..._

I felt his eyes on me and I turned to him, raising my eyebrows. He was staring at me with a mixture of incredulity and approval, and the next moment he was standing inches from me. In a very human move, I thought, he cupped my face with his hands and kissed me hard, then dropped one of his hands to my waist to pull me closer. I breathed in sharply, pleased and confused at his reaction, then I realized he must have caught that thought about children. I chuckled into his mouth.

"_Ashal-veh_," he whispered as he pulled away, "it pleases me that you wish that with me."

I simply kissed him again, and I saw an image flash across my mind: the two of us in a dim room, naked, intertwined. I felt myself heat up at the thought and I gripped him tighter in approval.

"That looks like a good idea," I murmured, nuzzling his neck. He stroked my hair.

"Then let us make it a reality," he said, his voice darkly mischievous. I grinned at him and pulled him toward the other room.

…

"You're absolutely sure about this, Tia?"

"Yes, I'm sure about this," I said to my father, smiling and shaking my head. My mother finished arranging my hair.

"Strange to wear purple to a wedding," she murmured, "but really, it looks good on you."

I smiled wider and smoothed the material of the dress Solok's sister had found for me. My parents were dressed in Vulcan robes, on loan from Solok's family. My brothers hadn't been able to make it, but they had contacted me yesterday wishing me congratulations.

"Purple is the color of our sky at dawn," said the old Vulcan priest, who was standing beside my father. "It is in a couple's joining that they find a new dawn. We associate the color with peace. Do you not wish that on your marriage?"

"I do. But on Earth, in most cultures, the bride wears white to her wedding. It represents purity," I replied with a nod to him. He solemnly nodded back.

"Interesting custom. And your mother is right, the color is agreeable on you."

I smiled at him, and we all turned when we heard a gong in the courtyard.

"It's time," the priest said. My mother led us out, with my father behind her, then the priest, and I was last. Solok was waiting, dressed in purple robes, and it struck me how handsome he looked, and I suppressed a smile as we knelt together. He held out two fingers toward me, and I did the same. I felt a pleasing spark when our fingers touched, and his eyes glittered as we stared at each other.

"What ye are about to witness comes down from the Time of the Beginning, without change," the priest said, starting the ceremony. "This is the Vulcan heart. This is the Vulcan soul. This is our way."

I couldn't help but let a tiny smile on my lips. I could feel his eagerness for this through his fingers, through the bond we already shared. He was mine.


	15. Epilogue

_**Disclaimer: See Chapter 1. Thank you to all the people who reviewed this story, and sorry for the long time between updates.**_

_6 years later_

I ordered Vulcan tea from the replicator and glanced around the Replimat for an empty table. Most of the people here were Starfleet officers on a late afternoon break, and I found a table in the corner and read the PADD the teachers had assigned me to study. My mother was on the Promenade, looking around at the various shops, and later, she would have a drink with an old shipmate from the _Delaware_, a woman named Madison Childress. She knew I was old enough to be left to my own devices for a few hours.

I scanned the Replimat once more and found a Trill and a human deep in conversation. The human struck me as familiar for some reason, and I racked my brain trying to place him. Perhaps father had mentioned a human who commanded Deep Space Nine...

Captain Benjamin Sisko laughed at something the Trill said, and I watched him in fascination. His head was clean-shaven and gleamed in the blue light of the Replimat, and his upper lip and chin were covered in coarse black hair. His eyes were dark and friendly as he said something to his companion, and I let a tiny smile grace my lips, then tucked a loose strand of my long black hair behind my delicately pointed ear. I continued reading in silence for another fifteen minutes.

"Excuse me, miss," I heard a deep, masculine voice say. I looked up at Captain Sisko. "Sorry to bother you, but I need to make sure you're not here alone."

The Trill beside him nodded. "Are your parents around here somewhere?" she asked, a warm, friendly smile on her face. I nodded.

"My mother is on the Promenade. She's shopping."

They smiled. "May we join you?" the captain asked. I nodded politely and set down the PADD.

"So," Sisko said casually, "what brings you to Deep Space Nine, Ms...?"

"T'Hayal," I replied with a bow of my head. "My father is arriving tomorrow after six months on the front lines."

The Trill smiled. "It's good to see family again, isn't it?"

I nodded politely. "I do not know your name, lieutenant," I said softly. She nodded in agreement.

"Ezri Dax. You can call me Ezri."

"Pleased to meet you, Ezri," I said, holding out my hand for her to shake. She took it with a smile and shook it, her grip firm.

"And I'm Captain Benjamin Sisko," the captain said, holding out his hand. I shook it.

"I know," I said softly. "My father has told me stories about you. You were at Starfleet Academy together, and he told me you were captain of the wrestling team."

Sisko smiled. "That's right. Who's your father?"

"Captain Solok. He commands the _T'Kumbra_."

At my words, Sisko's face fell into shock, but he quickly recovered and adopted a neutral expression. Ezri tilted her head, seemingly intrigued by my statement.

"Your father's a fine captain," Sisko said, filling the silence. I turned my gaze toward him. "I heard he received his second Christopher Pike Medal for Valor last month."

"Yes, he wrote to us about it. I mean to congratulate him when I see him tomorrow."

There was short pause, then Ezri spoke again. "What are you reading?" she asked.

"Basics of Biochemistry and Its Application in Genetics," I reeled off, raising an eyebrow at her. She grinned.

"Do you plan to be a scientist when you grow up?"

"My parents wish for me to be a scientist. My mother was a science officer on the _Deleware_ before she was transferred to the _T'Kumbra_, but she resigned her commission when I was born. We resided with father on his ship, but since the war started, mother and I have lived on Vulcan."

"Who's your mother?" Sisko asked.

Rather than reply, I nodded behind them, to where my mother was weaving between tables toward us.

"T'Hayal," she greeted with a smile. Sisko twisted around, and I saw his face contort in shock for the second time. Ezri's eyes were wide, and I tilted my head at them. My mother was human, but surely enough inter-species marriages had occurred for this not to be a shock. I got the distinct impression from Sisko's reactions that he didn't particularly like my father, and meeting his family was uncomfortable.

Sisko stood. "Excuse us, ma'am, we were just talking with your daughter."

My mother smiled. "That's my T'Hayal. Tia Valentin, captain," she said, holding out a hand. Sisko took it. "Pleased to meet you, sir."

The captain introduced himself and Ezri, and my mother turned to me. "Are you finished with your studies, T'Hayal?"

I shook my head. "I am nearly finished, but if you wish to have some tea with me, we can discuss what I have read."

Sisko smiled. "You've got a bright daughter, Mrs. Valentin. I hear your husband is coming tomorrow."

"Yes, the _T'Kumbra _should be here in the morning. Your station is lovely, captain. The merchants are all very friendly and helpful, and I didn't even know there was a Vulcan Embassy here. T'Hayal, have you seen it yet?"

Again, I shook my head. "No, mother, I have not. Do you wish to visit it?"

She smiled and nodded. "If you'll excuse us, captain, lieutenant."

We walked away after I nodded to the two officers, but I caught Sisko's comment as we left. "Would you look at that, old man? Old Solok's got himself a human wife...I wonder how's he handling that emotional handicap of hers."

I turned to mother when we were on the Promenade. "Captain Sisko was markedly uncomfortable when I mentioned Father," I commented lightly, glancing around at the shops and shoppers. The Promenade was colorful and boisterous, and although the sight of so many aliens gathered in one place was fascinating, the noise level made me long for the quiet of our quarters.

"Your father and Sisko didn't exactly see eye to eye at the Academy. But your father, I'm happy to say, has changed considerably since then."

I nodded and followed her to the Vulcan Embassy.

…

_**Solok's POV**_

The Bajoran colonel called Sisko in his office, and I climbed the steps to the double doors and waited. The doors opened and I stepped over the threshold, my eyes on the defiant human. He had changed...his hair was shaven off and he sported a goatee, and his face was a little more lined than I remembered. His expression wasn't as displeased as I thought it would be, rather, he was looking at me as if I were a stranger. I nodded my head in greeting.

"Welcome to Deep Space Nine, captain," he said quietly.

"Thank you. Your welcome is acknowledged," I replied calmly. My eyes fell on the chair in front of his desk. "May I?"

"Please," he murmured, gesturing to the seat. I sat down. "It's been a long time," he continued.

"Ten years, two months, five days," I said. He raised an eyebrow and smirked. "Our repair list."

I held out the PADD and he took it from me, setting down the PADD he was reading. He glanced over the list.

"I met your daughter yesterday on the Promenade," he said quietly, not looking up from the list. "She was studying biochemistry, and I swear that girl's not a day over seven."

"T'Hayal is six," I said, a tiny note of pride slipping into my voice. Sisko glanced up, slightly triumphant.

"We can upgrade your inertial dampeners by the end of the day, but to begin to overhaul your warp core would take at least a week."

I was about to retort when I paused. "I would call that inefficient, however...the more time you spend on these repairs, the more time I have to spend with my family. Take all the time you need, within reason."

My fellow captain looked up at me, confusion written in his features. He opened his mouth as if to speak, then snapped it shut and looked back over the list.

"We could probably get you some new impulse manifolds by next week if you like."

"That would be acceptable," I replied quietly. He handed the list back to me and I stood to leave.

"Hold on a minute," Sisko said before I could turn for the door. I looked back at him, then slowly sat back down. He leaned forward, shoving the other PADD out of his way, and rested his elbows on the desk, his eyes fixed on mine.

"I...I don't understand, captain," he said quietly, shaking his head.

"What don't you understand?"

He shook his head harder, and I could sense he was uncomfortable. "You are referring to my marriage," I offered. He looked at me, then nodded.

"You married a human, Solok?" A slight smile was growing on his lips. "And you have a daughter now?"

"Obviously," I replied calmly. "No doubt you find that amusing."

"I find it strange, is all. You of all people..."

I stared at him for a moment in silence. "I consider my wife to be one of the best of your species," I said firmly. "And my daughter has a promising future with Starfleet. My reasons for marrying Tia are my own."

"So your views have changed?" he asked defiantly.

"I believe the answer should be obvious. I do hold that Vulcans have several advantages over others, but my parents' views about your species was wrong." I paused. "If I offended you when we were in the Academy-"

"You don't have to apologize, Solok," Sisko said quickly, as if the thought of my doing so made him immensely uncomfortable. "Let's just forget about the past and move on. Go spend some time with your wife and daughter. After all, that's what we're fighting for here, isn't it?"

I looked down at him, then bowed my head. "We fight for what is ours, captain. Good day."

I left the office, and I could still see his smiling face as I walked back to the ship where Tia and T'Hayal were waiting for me.


End file.
